Quote:
Originally Posted by Klamninja
What about:
- her beautyful eyes, it's like I'd seen the stars.
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Good, Good! Now that's song writing!
But remember, is like necessary? If you want it there keep it, go ahead, but I'm a big big big fan of metaphors.
I don't know if you ever just look at the stars and talk with her, but if you do you could do something like:
Her eyes mingle with stars
as they sparkle and blend
together, as I lend
my words to her head
Getting the idea? It's all about personal experiences and finding powerful words and ways to express them