Music Banter - View Single Post - Last album you bought, downloaded or listened to

Anteater · 11-13-2009, 08:34 AM

Ken - By Request Only (1976)

Quoted from RateYourMusic:

Quote:

I recall it was about 3 years ago. A long day of panhandling and windshield wiping was up and I headed home to my shack. The door of the rotting building creaked open as I pushed, there hadn't been a handle on the door in the 3 months I had been living there. On the floor was the same mail as usual. Threats from the government about not paying my child support to my ex-wife. Threats from the actual owner of the shack, telling me my rent payments weren't up to date.

I slumped over on my couch, the only piece of furniture I had in my home. It was soaked from the leak in my roof. Then again, it had always been damp since the day I pulled it out of the dumpster behind the crummy apartment down the road. I lay there for a couple minutes, thinking to myself. I had eaten already, a hot dog that I bought with my daily earnings at the corner store. What I needed was some beer.

I still had money, about $400 from what I had stolen from my ex-wife before she kicked me out. I was going to need that. When I opened the cupboard, I was dismayed to find I had run out of beer. I needed to head down to the corner store to get more.

The fresh air did little to help me. I wanted a cigarette as bad as ever, but I wasn't going to buy them. I had none on my, either. I brought the beer inside, and put in the cupboard as I had no fridge. I pulled one out. The first one was always the best as it was usually the only cold one. I went back over to the couch and sat down with my beer.

Things were quiet. The dog across the street wasn't even barking on this night. I could hear everything. The dripping from the leak in my ceiling in the other room. The neighbour's talking about how much they needed for the weed they intended to buy.

I sat in the dark, and slowly finished my beer. From my pocket I pulled out my needle. Heroin. It kept me going. Soon I was relaxed again, away from the worries of a long day.

The silence was broken, though. I heard the slight creak of my door opening, and the sound of faint footsteps, those of someone who didn't want to be heard. I knew what this was. I reached for the leg from the chair that had long since been useable. I wasn't quick enough. Before I know it a lead pipe cracked on my arm.

"Don't. You grab at dat thing, iama break yer ****in arm, y'ear? Where is my cash?"

It was my dealer. I told him I didn't have any, but that was no use.

"You late again. I'm runnin' outta patience, y'ear. Dis time, you not gettin away wif it."

Jimmy, was the man's name. He had his two thugs there to work me over. Meanwhile he went through the house.

"Dis'll do just good," he said as he found my beer and my money.

His goons beat me hard, one with a lead pipe, the other with a crowbar. I nearly blacked-out, but I was still somewhat aware of what was going on. I was dragged out the door and thrown in the back of Jimmy's old pick up. We drove for some time.

Upon stopping, the goons yanked me back out of the truck. I was in no state of mind to do anything but go with it. I could see boats, so I figured I was at the marina. I figured right. I was thrown off the dock, down into the water.

With my last strength, I reached for the rope tying a boat to the dock as I drifted by. I dragged myself up on to the docking. With trouble I made out the name on the boat. "The Holy Spirit." Inside the boat I could hear and angelic voice. I was suddenly unaware of my pain. The dark was gone, replaced by a heavenly glow coming from inside the ship.

Strength was brought back to me, and I managed to make my way onto the ship. I opened the door of the cabin, finding inside a man with a glorious mustache singing. It was him. It was Ken.

That was the night my life was turned around. Today I'm telling you this storey from my lovely home in the suburbs with my lovely fiancee, Denise. What was one of the worst nights of my life turned into the greatest night I have ever experienced.

When you have Ken, you don't need drugs or booze. You don't need sex or theft. Ken is all you need. I know that Ken is all I need.