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Old 01-04-2010, 01:34 AM   #14 (permalink)
primo
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Quote:
Originally Posted by VEGANGELICA View Post
Hi Primo,

The portion of the song you have written creates an interesting situation that I'd like to see resolved in the rest of the song. The singer appears to feel ambivalence about the person s/he is infatuated with. Will the singer remain ambivalent or not? The last three lines, "If you...throw yourself/Then darling, I won't catch you before you fall," make me wonder if the rest of the song will show the singer getting to know him/herself better enough to be able to love and feel the drive that might bring this couple together. Or, will the writer stand by aloof, even if the girl/woman were to fall for him? This, at least, is how I interpret the song.

I like the line, "bite my lip," because it suggests some inner turmoil reflected in a physical motion.

You introduce the idea of the relationship "equation" in the second verse, then leave that idea hanging. I'd like to see it resurface in the rest of the song somehow. When you mention the equation, I want to learn more about how the two individuals *do* relate. I don't feel the song is about unrequited love but more yearning and wrestling with feelings of restraint and desire. Saying that you won't catch someone who is falling is intriguingly harsh, and doesn't seem to mesh with the infatuation expressed in the first stanza, so I wonder what is going on between the two people.



When you write, "but know that I will grow stronger," is this addressed to the woman or is the writer addressing herself/himself?

Finally, the line "just can't see who I'm looking for" confuses me somewhat, because I felt the writer was interested in the woman described in the song. You have introduced lots of unanswered questions in the first section of your song! I'll be interested to see how you deal with them in the rest of the song.

--Erica

Wow.. thanks for your thorough analysis! I really value that sort of feedback.
As you said, the song is about yearning and wrestling with feelings of restraint and desire, but not so much for a specific girl. I guess the narrator’s ambivalence lies in how he feels inept of experiencing love with anybody, but is still yearning to feel what love is.
So the "see her, then with him" is about recognising love (seeing a random girl who he can sort of relate with (being single) only to see she's got a partner) which provokes the singer’s thoughts on his lack of love; he thinks about how he’s alone and has no love interest so basically pities himself. So the “darling I won’t catch you” line is sort of like a warning to any interested girls to leave him alone and not bother chasing, as he feels he can’t reciprocate.
The “Wanna fell how you’d touch me,when I touch you, intimiacy” isn’t referring to a specific girl, but wanting to feeling what love is. So the “just can’t see who i’m looking for” explains that he doesn’t know who that girl is, if there is one.
“don’t know which part’a the equation I am, but know that I will grow, stronger, when I know who I am” is addressed to the singer himself; the solution of the “equation” is love, but he doesn’t know what part he plays, what part of the problem (feeling incapable of love) he is, but has some hope that he will change.. Which sort of contradicts the tone of the chorus, I guess.. lol basically the verse is the narrator thinking to himself, and the chorus is the cry to a girl who might’ve spoken of her love for him.
I didn't realise how much of a mess this song is – for its relative simplicity the lyrics shouldn’t be so inarticulate.. LOL I guess that's what a bad lyrics are. But atleast i'm learning, so thanks all of you again! Did I clarify what i'm trying to communicate though?
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