I had to post this, pretty darned funny! What next???
A man has been banned from a public park - after he allegedly tried to have sex with a tree.
William Shaw, 21, has been ordered by a court not to enter Central Park in Airdrie after claims he attempted to bonk the plant. It is alleged he dropped his trousers and underpants and exposed himself while in the visitor attraction in September last year. It is claimed he then tried to have simulated sex with the tree while his trousers were around his ankles. Shaw, of Airdrie, yesterday pleaded not guilty to an act of public indecency at the town's sheriff court.
Sheriff Frank Pieri released Shaw on bail - on the condition that he stays away from Central Park. Last night Shaw was unavailable to discuss the allegations at his flat. A neighbour said: "I have seen him about and he seems a quiet lad."
Shaw is due to stand trial next month. He was also accused of committing the offence while on bail for another matter from November 2007. It is not the first bizarre sex charge to hit the headlines in Scotland. In 2007 Steven Marshall, 19, admitted simulating sex with the pavement in Galashiels, Selkirkshire.In the same year Robert Stewart, 53, was caught by two cleaners having sex with a bicycle in his hostel room in Ayr.