Your belief that the ultimate answer is that there is no ultimate answer is self-contradictory, and since the "ultimate answer" is the root of all your thought structures and hence all your behavior, everything you do traces back to a contradiction which means you can only ever be in conflict with your situation. If life is meaningless, as some claim, that doesn't mean that you can make your own meaning, which would imply that life in fact has a plurality of meanings, which would make it profoundly meaningful. What the statement "life is meaningless" means is that any attempt to establish meaning subverts itself. That's incredibly scary. That means that every thing you could possibly do ever will undo itself. That's true meaninglessness. That's not something you get around by saying, well fuck it playing guitar is what will be meaningful for me. It means that the more you get into playing guitar the more you will realize that it's only making you suffer.
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