"one of my mates said "pull my finger" to make him fart, then he accidently shat himself. LAD"
"A rowdy northern friend of mine took his bird to some clubs for her birthday it turned out her friends were in the same club. Sensing this was to be a **** night he bought her a helium balloon and tied it to her wrist telling her that she had to keep it on as it was special. The balloon aloft her head gave up her position anywhere in the club allowing him to get off with several other birds. Simples. LAD"
"According to Volvic, apparently it's an achievement to drink 1.5 litres of water a day. I down 5 pints every time I get home to avoid a hangover the next day. LAD"
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