Originally Posted by GuitarBizarre

my worst one ever:

Out for a mates b-day, we leave the club, I'm justifiably sloshed, having consumed 13 pints of cider and a couple shots.

Girl comes up to me and starts fishing for compliments, she says something about thinking she's fat.

What I intend to say: "Eh, chill out, you're obviously not, don't worry about it"

What I actually said: "Eh, being fat is the least of your problems"

Woops. Cue 20 seconds of silence before my brain catches up with my mouth, and I say "I'm very sorry, I think I've just said the exact opposite of what I meant to say"