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Old 12-05-2010, 09:23 AM   #629 (permalink)
thirtiesgirl
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Loss Angeles
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Unchained Ballad View Post
I found your attitude arrogant, defensive and unnecessary. I'm not sure who you mean with "You Guys", but that aside I beleive Zaqarbal merely clarified your initial question about the thread being about the beauty of a woman's voice or their physique. After that you merely started picking a fight, even if the argument was fairly civil in the beginning.
The tone you took just now was perfectly adequate, nothing against that, you just explained your cause.
Ooh, I've been deemed "perfectly adequate" by a guy. I've done my job and obtained a modicum of acceptance. Goody. My question was why do you find my 'attitude' "arrogant, defensive and unnecessary." You haven't answered that question, merely repeated what you said before. And the answer Zaq gave me as to the point of this thread was what I suspected: it's a thread where most guys post pics of women they find physically attractive, and it has very little to do with admiration of their musical talent, creativity, personality or world view. I'm sure there are some guys who have posted pics of women in this thread that they admire for more than their looks, but the majority is all about the physical.

While I know I'm not going to change the male gaze or guys' looks-based assessment of women, what I can do is present an alternative to the many posts in this thread that are all about looks by posting pics of women with a variety of body shapes, women who I admire not just for their looks, but for their accomplishments, their creativity and talent. Which is what I did, and was then questioned by Zaq on my choice to include Beth Ditto because he doesn't find her physically attractive. Zaq further bolstered his assessment that Beth is unattractive because she's fat by posting several 'comparison pics' of Beth and thinner women. As I wrote above, if Zaq's intentions were not to offer pictorial commentary on Beth's weight as the reason he finds her unattractive, why not then post 'comparison pics' of Beth and Mama Cass, or Beth and the women from Gravy Train, Beth and Adele? Why choose slender women as his point of comparison? I've played this game for too long and seen too much sizeism disguised as other things, so I can see it when it's there. If Zaq doesn't find Beth attractive, that's his prerogative. But there's no need to continuously maintain what we already know to be true, that the general public thinks all fat people are unattractive, lazy, slovenly, unambitious, etc. Fat people receive that message every day of their lives. It might be nice to be able to have some places where we can go where that message is not reinforced, for a change.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Unchained Ballad View Post
s_k was clearly referring to a member of Vengaboys, he has no idea who Beth Ditto is, as you would notice if you'd read his post properly.
Perhaps it's a language issue, since s_k is not a native English speaker. Regardless, I don't care who he's calling a slut, whether it's Beth or anyone else. Calling anyone a slut is unnecessary. We don't need more slut shaming going on.
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