Quote:
Originally Posted by Vanilla
I need help right now, but I don't think my folks understand how fragile I am. Everything about life seems so difficult right now even though I've achieved so much. I have had the week from hell just been with losing my financial income and have to apply for the benefit. My parents who are also financially dire have to support me during this and they are NOT impressed and think I need to take more responsibility. All I've wanted to do lately is watch the blood flow down from my wrists or the feeling of warmth from the alcohol I drink to swallow down the pills. Of course I didn't and won't. But I can't stress enough how an emotional state can cause yourself to lose control.
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I know how much it sucks being a poor student and having to borrow to live... and if you're a student in NZ who doesn't qualify for allowance, that places you on the bottom rung of the ladder, even below the voluntary dole bludgers.
I'm in the same boat as I'm also applying for the benefit. I've secured a job but I'll be skint until I can start work in late Jan, especially as I have to pay rent over the summer. Two days ago I looked at my bank account and saw that I had 170 in funds and 220 owing on the c/c so I immediately caught a bus back home in the hope that I'd spend less here... spend less and eat better because I was sick to death of living on bloody jam sandwiches and feeling hungry all the time.
Anyway, you gotta keep on trucking - things can only get better from here
