I only tried suicide. (Well... no ****, of course I only 'tried')
Through a large ingestion of poison. Strangely enough, it wasn't out of depression at all. It was more a megalomaniac feeling of being able to just die, and not give a ****. Also, strangely enough, it came after I actually got my **** sorted, and everything seemed to be working out ok, almost as if it was the reason for doing it in the first place.
Arrived at the hospital, learned I didn't really ingest enough to do anything, and ended up with thousands of dollars of bills, and part of this really tacky kindergarten-escue support group thing. Apart from a couple of the people I met briefly through the support group thing, was a waste of time, and felt like more of a reason for these really flawed, frankly phony, scam government organizations(at least the ones I was dealing with) to charge me, and then reduce the price at the cost of other branches of the government.
Tried seriously only a few times after that. Not once out of depression. Always out of rage, and the feeling of gaining control in my rather dull life. Never anything serious. Think I busted up some blood vessels in my neck once trying to strangle myself with a belt. Nothing like slit wrists, or anything.
Apart from the poison one, I'm not even sure whether or not they were really suicide attempts, or just ways to exhaust my inner frustrations in lack of direction in life. Haven't tried in awhile, and don't feel compelled to. Maybe because I finally feel in control, and with direction. Don't know...
Interesting times, though.
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