When the Buddha spoke of the cessation of desire, he wasn't implicitly speaking of the natural instinctive desires of the body to satiate itself through eating, sex, acquisition of wealth et al, but the of the elimination of the suffering that arises from the psychological attachment to what one desires. Even though all forms of Buddhism are replete with asceticism, What's intrinsic to the central and first of the four noble truths "Life is suffering" is meant to bring the follower a place of acceptance where he/she can transcend that suffering through finding peace within the present moment, which is all we really have. That, in my own personal estimation is what true enlightenment is.
There are many sects of Buddhism, Mahayana I believe is one of them, that don't perceive enlightenment as a permanent escape from the endless birth/death cycle, but as a genuine acceptance that suffering and joy must exist as contrasting components of each other, that each contain elements of each other, and that through that acceptance, life, the present moment, in it's finite transitory and nature, can truly be embraced.
I don't really know about the sexism thing. I don't doubt that it exists within the tenets of many sects of Buddhism. I know that the cast system is still very present in a lot of Buddhist,Hindu, and Vedantic cultures, sects, and belief systems, but I would hope that this would be something that even these ancient religions and cultures would be able to evolve beyond.
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