Bullying
 

Have you experienced bullying? Should high schools do more to help those being bullied? What should that be exactly? Do you think it gets easier once you finish school? Is it up to teachers or friends to help?

Do you think that people are getting bullied far more now with the internet?

If you've any direct experiences I'd be interested in hearing about it. Only if you feel comfortable.

I have indeed experienced this.

Not as badly as some. But still bullied none the less.

The only twist with my bully, (the one I had my entire childhood and teenage years)
My bully and I met each other again, as grown women, we had been through it all as kids and teenagers, fist fights, excessive shouting when we would see one another all that ****. She'd call me ******, I'd call her a *** guzzling street walker, sunrise sunset.
Anyway we met again at the age of 25 we both were working at the same place. Over the course of about a month the girl managed to work the courage and talk to me. And the first day she did say something it was not at all what I thought it was gonna be.
What she said is classified, but just know over that entire summer we worked together, we became inseparable, she even became my roommate for a bit when her boyfriend kicked her out.

As far as the internet is concerned, the internet has been kind to me all my life. I am not too sure why, not complaining by any means at all, just can't figure that one out. It's easier to bully someone through the anonymity of a computer knowing, you will mostly never run into that person, and have to put your money where your mouth is.

Schools don't give a shit. I once saw a lad in my class get filled in for no reason (he was a bit nerdy & small & used to get shit a fair bit), was sprawled over the desk at the end pissing with blood, this happened in front of the teacher and they didn't step in or anything. The lad didn't even get a detention lol.

There was an older lad who would constantly kick off at me when I was 13, it went on for three years. Shit scared walking to school & coming back cos I knew what would happen if I bumped into him. I never told anyone for fear of being lol'd at and there was fuck all I could do cos he was a genuine nut case and was usually with a group so I just took it lol. Cunt.

School's are "zero tolerance" now, meaning you can get suspended for getting your ass kicked. I'm not sure how helpful that is to victims.

I was bullied in jr. high, but by high school I was the weird kid that entertained people with my dorky jokes.

I used to get a fair amount of **** at school and I don't think it affected me badly, it seems to have affected the bullies more. I was at a party last year and boy that used to be pretty nasty to me came up and said 'do you remember that time I threw you in a puddle before school? I still wake up in the middle of the night thinking about that' and apologised. I don't remember it. It seems like his scars have lasted longer than mine.

At a young age, severe bullying can be a sign that the bully themselves are victims of a broken home life. Of course, little bunches of privileged jerks tend to aggregate and pick on people for being different, too, so it's not always so black and white.

That wouldn't happen. The bully would have been suspended and so would the nerd if he tried to defend himself. Apparently the moral thing to do when you're getting your teeth knocked out is to smile so the other guy can aim better.

That's what pisses me off about how schools deal with bullying. It's not about protecting anyone, it's about protecting the school from liability just in case anyone decides to sue them because they didn't do enough to stop something. You can't sue them if they won't even let the victim do anything about it I guess.

Enlightened my ass, it's just bureaucratic responsibility shirking.

I can 1,000% confirm that it did happen mate, got no reason to lie.

The only time there was any kind of violence in school I know of where someone got punished for it was one of my mates who got permanently excluded, but he beat up one of the teachers, not a pupil.

Oops. I meant to write "That wouldn't happen in America."

That happened when I was in junior high. A guy that had ditched basically the entire semester and been kicked out of said class many times, basically showed up one day and grabbed a fire extinguisher and emptied the contents all over a science teacher. The teacher wasn't having it and grabbed it away and swung it at the kid. The kid avoided it and punched the teacher in the face. He was expelled from our entire school district and was forced to do home studies for the rest of his schooling.

I was only picked on briefly in like sixth grade and it was because my jeans were too short or something, whatever that means. No one would ever try to get physical with me because they knew I had no problem fighting back.

Other than that, I pretty much liked everybody and everybody was pretty fine with me throughout middle and high school. I was proud to have friends in all cliques so it was easy.

I naturally have a deep hatred for physical bullying, especially because it's often the fat behemoths that weighed 160 as a fourth grader going up against the shrimps that weighed 80. How is that fair? Cyber bullying and all that stuff is a touchie subject but I don't have any sort of interesting opinion to add to the matter so that's all I got.

Wow that's really good that you guys worked it out.

I was bullied by guys mainly. They would call me ugly, white bait (my pale skin), one guy in particular used to sing to me: "got to put on my shades cause your legs are so white". I was called a slut by one girl so I called her one back and she lost it lol (her friend apologised to me amazingly). Another group of girls that were at the school near my house used to follow me home and prank called me a lot. They said I called one of the girls a slut which I didn't and threatened to give me a hiding. I told my folks and my mom told their principal and they got in big trouble. They never bothered me again.

I definitely think I got it pretty easy compared to some people but I used to have so many rumours spread around about me: one boob bigger than the other, stuffing my bra, signing up to a dating site, that I was a lesbian, all of which were not true (apart from boob being slightly bigger than the other). I did make out with many girls because I was questioning my sexuality but never went any further. I got teased right throughout school but I took it really well, it built up my confidence and although people were calling me a skank I still had great fun as a teenager meeting lots of new people and doing the party thing. My school had retreats (it was a Catholic school) and we had to write nice things about each other and basically all of them said that I was funny, outgoing and kind so that was nice.

I definitely think that it is possible to stop bullies from bullying people but it's dependent on the bully, their life and why they are doing it. Boys get bullied physically and girls tend to get shut out from friends, hassled online and verbally. But there is also girls that get physical.

No probs Batty :beer:

Ahh the cyber bully. Yes. Right like I said the internet has been unreasonably kind to me over the years. Maybe because it knows I have stuck with it since the days of the dial tone, hiss, and MIRC. I dunno.

But I see it. I understand it. And I don't think it makes the bullying any less real for the bully or the bullied. I kinda feel like if the internet is the only place someone feels excepted whether they are socially awkward, live on an island, or whatever I feel like they should have this space to be themselves, and not be subject to the mockery and ridicule of others, that is un-welcomed. That's the key word, right there un-welcomed. They is always going to be playful jokes, or tasteless comments, and there is always going to be that one ******* that really ****s with you. But mostly I think with cyber bullying there is things that can be done to prevent it on both sides of the argument.

The bully should really sit back and realize that while yes, that person does indeed look like a beached beluga in those shorts and the God awful tube top, they don't need to necessarily tell that person that.

And the bullied really should ask themselves is this a picture of myself I want to live on in infamy? No? Ok good delete. I mean that is just common sense right there.

I write **** left and right, poetry, songs and ****. Do I clutter up Mb with it, good heavens no, not because I don't want to, but because I know I am not comfortable accepting criticism in that area of my life. I am comfortable posting in a journal (which I need to stop slacking on) about music I like and why I like it. But I am not comfortable sharing my soul with you guys. (Not all of you anyway.) So I don't put it up there. Everybody wins, you guys don't have to try and think of something nice to say, and I don't have to fret that no one will have something nice to say.

Same goes with the match making thread earlier. I was astounded by the amount of people that thought something that was created in good fun could be harmful to peoples self esteem, yet some of the people in the thread doing the bitching ended up really hurting a participant that had no problem with the thread. I was completely flabbergasted by the irony. I dunno I try to get on with everybody. **** do I know though. I like you all, honest to God. (Even WpN) NOW HOW BOUT THAT MOTHA****AS? BOOOYAH!

were you rocking high water jeans?
http://iadorecreativity.files.wordpr...highwaters.jpg

Yes same here. It was the best strategy to be able to roll through most of the cliques and have contacts with at least one or two people in each one.

I feel like getting bullied is a rite of passage that ends up helping people to be able to cope with bullies/aggressive people later on in life. I do recognize that bullying nowadays is on a whole other level though with having the bullying situation follow you home basically and crossing over into cyber bullying.

TLDR :thumb:

Im sorry I dunno what that means.First day on this brave new contraption called the inter web.....

No really? Whuut?

No it wasn't that severe haha, they only rose up above my shoes when I was sitting down. Wasn't my fault my parents made me wear jeans a little longer than everyone else before buying me new pairs when I was growing :P

Kids were stupid in 6th grade.

ive been on both sides of the field ive been bullied and been the bully (not a cruel one though)

And though a bully can make your life a living hell i think confronting your bully can teach you an important life lesson

imo the real damage a bully does is more emotional than physical, Punches hurt but living in fear is what really gets you

i successfully dealed with bigger bullies than me by turning their posee against them, i would ridicule them with words that made his own friends laugh at him, yea you might be stronger than me but you ain't smarter

One bully i painted as a ***, i would tell him "What's your obsession with me? i don't give a **** about you but you're always bothering me, you in love with me or something?"

Even most bullies fear social pressure so if you can figure out how to use that against him you could beat him without throwing a simple punch

doesn't work in every case though, i once had to threaten a bully with a knife
Good thing he backed out cause i was gonna stab him for real.

It means "Too long, didn't read."

No kiddin....:bonkhead:

Kids used to try b/c I was a poor kid from a single parent family in a rich ass school

That didn't last long once my temper got loose

:laughing:

@Roxy

As a teacher I can safely say that schools in my area go above and beyond their expectations when it comes to bullying. But there is only so much teachers can do when most of the bullying occurs outside of school hours.

Bullying has also changed a lot since I was in school. Now, lots of bullying is of course cyber bulling. Maybe more education into using social media safely and the consequences of publishing certain things to social media would be beneficial to bullies and victims, but who knows.

I don't really get cyber bullying, just turn the computer off and DONE!

you can avoid ppl in the internet in alot of ways.

Yeah but kids as young as 8 - 13 years of age don't have that kind of resilience, well at least many don't.

True.

The worst case of cyber bullying i heard was a guy killing himself in some chat.

i think he was depressed or something and shared with ppl he was gonna kill himself and some ppl tried to help him, but most of them incited him to actually do it and he actually did it. :(

idk if that counts as cyber bullying but it definitely shows how desensitized ppl can be over the net.

That's awful. Yeah there are lots of very sad stories like that going around.

At the school where I work, most cases of cyberbullying are other kids posting something nasty on some social media site about someone else, or uploaded a rudely photoshopped picture of someone, or something like that.

We get rudely photoshopped pictures here. Lol, it's like try harder!

I got some **** in middle school for being one of the very few white people there. I got jumped once and kids used to try and steal my backpack and **** until they realized I didn't have anything worth taking. Highschool, ugh. I went to a pretty elitist school that was really ****in hard to get into for visual art. I basically got the cold shoulder for being dirty and not having the nice/cool clothes and ****. The thing about bullying is you still encounter ****ty ass people in life later on as an adult, but when you're a kid going to school... you have to see those people every single weekday. As an adult, it's just petty to act like that and you don't generally have to deal with it all the time.

Agreed, but what are the parents doing allowing their kids to use the internet unsupervised at those ages?

My cousin used to get shit online, was about 15-16 and used to post the corniest stuff on Facebook, consistently, and get shit for it. Then he would carry on posting it. He didn't even delete the perpetrators from his friends list, I used to see them commenting & ganging up on him and want to kick their heads in but I stayed out of it cos I wanted him to stick up for himself plus there wasn't really much I could do anyway.

This will make me sound harsh, & I don't think anyone deserves to be bullied, but some people (like my cousin) really don't help themselves.

That was my first thought as well, where is the Parental block?

but then i kept thinking how kids always find a way around their parents so they can't shield them from everything.

In my case, my mother had no idea of the troubles i had as a teen, ONE time i asked for advice of how to deal with a bully and her advice was useless. (Never asked her again)

Well, firstly, I work in an area of extremely low socio-economic status so the parents really couldn't give a fuck, which is why the teachers end up mediating it. Secondly, technology changes so rapidly that there are probably parents who don't understand the magnitude of internet safety, or more appropriately, internet savvy. Think, Facebook was founded only 10 years ago and now there a plethora of social media sites out there that have grown in immense magnitude, their kids can probably outmsart them in terms of blockage/banning/education/etc.

I just think there probably needs to be more education on building up your resilience, dealing with bullies, and acting responsibly and safely in public and networked internet spaces. It's not always about "why aren't the parents supervising them" - do you really think that parents can monitor 100% of a child's internet activity in this day and age?!

To be honest, most parents don't give a flying f*ck about what their kid is doing on the Internet. Kids have access to laptops and tablets that they can also take into private areas away from parents, and then go visit website they know their parents would never approve of. My parents never exactly cared about what I did on the Internet, and that was back before tablets and whatnot (before I had my own computer in my room). Our computer was not in a more public area so I could use it for hours without being bothered. I knew better than to go into chat rooms or anything my parents wouldn't approve of - I just played games mostly (lol@ basic dial up flash games).

Fair point.

Agree w/ highlighted.

As for the question, alright, no.

It is different now, but kids in that age group (you mentioned as young as 8) shouldn't be owning tablets and phones and being left to use them unsupervised that's irresponsible. And this was the case for both my cousins, dunno if other parents do it just saying I know they could basically do what they want.

People can argue you can't tell them no, because all their mates have them so they'll feel left out but ffs grow a set and tell them no.

The mental aspect of it is always the worst. I presume internet bullying in that sense involves terrible torture to sensitized individuals. Who knows what playful comments may cause tremors in the brains of young fellows, which may end up halting it at a certain stage of development. My bones still quiver at the thought of swimming or dancing for example.

On the other hand, memories of minor physical instances like the forceful push to the ground or the beating on the backside from an headmaster muster only a slight shrug with a secret sense of superior pride. What really does hurt is the sense of betrayal from a fellow pupil - giving away your petty games to the headmaster to earn points, letting silly secrets out to the entire class - that sort of piffle. It means that a heavy amount of self-isolation is to follow. And some of its byproducts such as melancholy, depression, physical insecurities and an incessant self-consciousness might end up remaining with the person for years or even decades.