“Hello. My name is Baltazar. I am a pop music hater”
 

By pop music I mean the whole lot -- except Jilted John and Blondie. I’ve always hated it, those who listen to it, and the culture -- youth culture -- which spawns it. I loathe the big record companies, three chords repeated over and over, Top of the Pops, and Paul McCartney. Bob Geldoff is the biggest tit in the universe and Sting should be muzzled. Don’t even mention his wife. Black music obsessed with guns, burning homosexuals and calling women ‘bitches’ would be a disgrace if it didn’t show what small penises the artists have, while music glorifying illegal drugs has helped destroy whole nations, such as Colombia and Peru, and keeps generations of drug gangsters on the streets.

There.

I’ve said it.

That feels better.

But I’m genuinely here to learn, not to wind up, troll, or as an attention-seeking exercise. All my friends laugh at my ignorance, my prejudices harm no one except me -- I’m missing out on some major art -- and I’m fed up with being stuck in a classical music ghetto. Also I loved John Peel. He was such a great bloke he must have been right about something.

Plus my ignorance puts me in bed with people who, arguably, are bigger twats than Sting: retired colonels harumphing about the ‘youth of today,’ Murdoch journalists wanking about gangsta rap, and tweedy Young Fogies who dislike pop music only because they weren’t allowed in the cool gang at school.

Where’s the best place to start? I don’t want to go out and buy a Cher album. I’ve seen her in films, she’s clearly a good egg, but when she opens her mouth to sing I feel my spirits drop and the cat runs from the room.

have a look at some dub or afrobeat if you want somehting outside of pop and awesome
Notables:

scientist
fela kuti

i love pop in the sense of music with hooks
and that includes all genres for me
but a certain disgust for the majority of commercialised music is fine by me

and cher is just plain scary

Start off with synth pop and new wave. New Order is a fairly easy pop act to swallow and has done a good job of standing the test of time. Pop Will Eat Itself is another brilliant pop act.

Well at least you're honest, though if you want to avoid winding people up you probably shouldn't make enormous generalisations on an entire race's music.

You like John Peel? Great start, the man was brilliant, introduced a huge amounts of acts to the public, some obscure but some great pop acts like T-Rex, David Bowie, Pulp and my personal favourite The Smiths.

You seem like quite the englishman so Pulp's Different Class might be a good album.

Blondie - Parallel Lines
The Kinks - Village Green Preservation Society
Michael Jackson - Thriller
The Cure - Head On The Door
and to destroy the black music stereotype, De La Soul - 3 Feet High and Rising.

That's just a few you could try.

I appreciate the suggestions. I’ll work through the list and report the results.

Point taken. I was telling it exactly as I feel and accept that the ‘burn homosexuals’ crew are just a nasty pimple on the arse of black music. If anyone’s offended they can say so and I’ll eat humble pie. Alternatively, if they wish to defend that musical culture I’ll argue with them in a civilized manner.

Right. That goes top of the list. Any more?

I don't think anyone's going to be defending being anti-homosexuals but you just have to remember that artists like that represent only a small minority of black music, and admittedly this isn't helped at all by the media.

You like Bob Marley? Exodus is essential if you haven't heard it already.

If you hate pop and you respect John Peel, then you'll love The Fall.

For further guidance refer to this member; Urban Hatemonger (click link) for more details.

check out wire and gang of four

and mogwai...cause im a bit behind the 8-ball and just discovered how much they kick ass

I accept that. In the same way that East German Nazi rock bands represent only a small minority of white music. I also suspect that many people attack it -- black music with homophobic lyrics -- not because they're oh so concerned about homosexual rights but because they want to attack black people.

Very much, and no I haven't. I knew this would happen: too much to listen to. But I'll work through it slowly - do my homework ;) - and report back for fresh instructions. Thank you.

I can’t be the first person to land on this forum and ask for help? I had a quick search but couldn’t find an obvious ‘Yoof Culture for Dummies’ thread. But if they do exist a link would be good so people don’t have to go over old ground.