Robert Christgau - self-proclaimed dean of US rock critics.
 

Anyone know of a more moronic and shallow ******* of a music critic?

Pierre Scruffi or whatever he's called.

I don't pay attention to him, because I usually disagree.

He's an arrogant bastard.

The Daily Dischord review site that's sometimes cited on Wikipedia has some pretty bad ones.

I love me some Christgau. It's best not to take him too seriously. Even though he takes himself pretty seriously.

It just hurts me that there is such a poor writer out there, and prominent too. Some people may actually listen to him...and that is very dangerous

He'll die soon enough. Or go deaf, but I don't know if that would affect his reviews at all.

I don't know how he thinks he can sum up an entire record with two sentences of insults.

Rob Sheffield is pretty bad too.

OK Computer [Capitol, 1997]
My favorite Pink Floyd album has always been Wish You Were Here, and you know why? It has soul, that's why--it's Roger Waters's lament for Syd, not my idea of a tragic hero but as long as he's Roger's that doesn't matter. Radiohead wouldn't know a tragic hero if they were cramming for their A levels, and their idea of soul is Bono, who they imitate further at the risk of looking even more ridiculous than they already do. So instead they pickle Thom Yorke's vocals in enough electronic marginal distinction to feed a coal town for a month. Their art-rock has much better sound effects than the Floyd snoozefest Dark Side of the Moon. But it's less sweeping and just as arid. B-


can he get anymore idiotic?

Sometimes he just uses frowny faces.

Since when is comparing an album to DSOTM an insult?

He's like the Christgau of obscure Prog except his site is actually useful and his reviews are longer than one sentence.

When it's accomponied with a B-...

And the word before it is "snoozefest."

That's a 3.5 star rating (about)...

He gave souljaboytellem.com an A-.

oh god^

Christgau has nothing on the likes of Greil Marcus or (God forbid) Lester Bangs.

At least Christgau had the balls (or damaged hearing) to give a Justin Timberlake album an "A."

Christgau gives me countless hours of amusement and amazement.

He's the brilliant a-hole who declared rock n roll dead. Too much in love with himself, the 60's/70's, NYC music (particularly Lou Reed) to be of any objective value these days. Only good for some occasional nostalgia.

I find him funny now. Most people like **** music anyway. He's not going to do any real damage.

worst of the worst by far, his top album ever is Captain Beefheart "Trout mask Replica" as innovative as the album is, its unlistenable.

How on earth is trout mask replica unlistenable? I love that album.

He hates art-rock. Which is hardly a genre... I kinda think he just slaps the "art-rock" term on anything he doesn't understand.

Lester Bangs


Not because of what he's said or done, but because morons like to make him out to be some sort of martyr. Plus, he had shit taste in music.

Christgau is an elitist douche and his reviews are bloody terrible.

I wouldn't say he's the worst though, Pitchfork takes the prize.

Alternative Press, Blender, NME and Slate are pretty f*cking bad too. You know things are grim when Rolling Stone probably do actually give the most decent and fair reviews of any mainstream music magazine. Further proof that music critics in this day and age are pretty much useless.

Nothing tops what I've read from Mark Beaumont. That Kid A review will haunt me forever.

David Fricke is the only music critic I particularly like, really.

Am I the only one who wishes Pitchfork still had Brent DiCrescenzo?

Even though I still like Pitchfork. They're funny.

He gives every half-assed album with afrobeat influence an A, yet slaps Yes's Close to the Edge with a mother****ing C ....what the hell? o.O

I don't care if he thinks he's cool for vehemently writing off what he considers to be pretentious or strange; it doesn't change the unfortunate reality of him being a complete asswipe when it comes to things beyond his limited ability to comprehend, and this shows in quite a few of his reviews.

Man, his prog reviews are awwwwwwwwwwwwful.

I can't take anyone who gives a Soulja Boy album A- and In The Court of the Crimson King a D+ seriously as a human being, let alone as a music critic.

Most music critics are supposed to have a certain field or speciality, but Christgau tries to cover everything, which only makes it more clear just how narrow and sh*tty his taste in music really is.

not intentionally though. they're still wallowing in oblivion.

i wish i could find it but there was a clutch review of Spiritualized's Ladies and Gentlemen that was basically an angsty review of a party the kid was at. needless to say i was loling hard.

I prefer Piero Scaruffi...

It's as if Christgau doesn't even put any effort into his work.

I don't think I've had the slightest clue as to what he's on about.

I've just found this and for some reason reading what you put I was expecting it to be a rapturous acclamation. It's not. Should be fun reading it.

douchebag

I can't believe it took me over two years to notice this but hell no. DiCrescenzo is without a doubt the worst music reviewer I've ever read. Completely worthless writing that tells you absolutely nothing about the music.

Cristgau Shitgau

the WRC (Web Reviewing Circle) is where it's at - George Starostin, Mark Prindle, John McFerrin, Donignacio and Ade Denning (even if I think he's a twat)

Yeah, I have nothing against Christgau. In real life I don't even think he has a pretentious attitude, I think he just approaches the whole reviewing process in a completely different manner than what most people are used to. I find that refreshing, not particularly annoying. Yeah, sometimes he sounds like a dick, but at the end of the day all music reviewers have to sound like dicks to a certain degree. Who the fuck wants to listen to the same sycophantic bull**** about how great a certain band is?