The Self Stimulation Thread
 

It's about time for a thread dedicated to a favorite past time of MB members and in fact almost all people around the world, a thread dedicated to songs about masturbation.

Call it what you like, flogging the dolphin, bruising the beaver, milking the snake, choking the chicken or any other adjective\animal metaphor.

Maybe you prefer to refer to it as slapping the salami, pounding the meat, circling the wagons, coddling the conch shell or addressing the abalone regardless here is a short list of songs about stroking it, hopefully with a little time you can make it grow.

Pump it Up and Mystery Dance - Elvis Costello
Turning Japanese - The Vapors
Darling Nikki - Prince
Holiday Song - The Pixies
Praying Hands - Devo
Pictures of Lilly - The Who
Dancing with myself - Billy Idol
She Bop - Cindi Lauper
Longview - Green Day
My Ding-a-ling - Chuck Berry

Additional submissions:
Orgasm Addict - The Buzz****s
Blister in the Sun - The Violent Femmes
Girls of Porn - Mr. Bungle
I Touch Myself - DiVinyls
The Key to her Ferrari - Thomas Dolby
Jellyfish - He's My Best Friend
Thinking About You - Radiohead


I'll submit one maybe for ya'lls approval

"Rocket Man"

Is this about doing the no pants solo dance?

Get to it people...


and when your done think of some songs about it.

Orgasm Addict - The Buzzcocks
Blister in the Sun - The Violent Femmes

:laughing:

Utter filth. I am utterly disgusted.

Urban Dictionary: wank

;)

Ooh, how about "Girls of Porn" by Mr. Bungle? That's pretty much the ultimate masturbation song. It's pretty hard (no pun intended) to beat (no pun intended) these lyrics:

My hand gets tired and my dick gets sore
But the girls of porn want more
So I flip throught the pages one more time
And I just let the jism fly

If you've never heard the song I'd just like to add that these lyrics are quite soulfully sung.

Dammit! I was about to post that! :laughing: That song rules and is indeed hard to beat.

Good Friday - Why?

The song doesn't really revolve around it, but he sprinkles references pretty liberally.

if you grew up with white boys
who only look at black and puerto rican porno
cause they want something that their dad don't got
then you know where you're at

jerking off in an art museum john till my dick hurts
the kind of shit i won't admit to my head shrinker

My effort to make it grow...

I Touch Myself - DiVinyls
The Key to her Ferrari - Thomas Dolby

And a new one I'll leave to your judgement :
Love vs Porn - Kevin Drew
"Well i woke up and my mouth was a little dry
so i grab moisturizer and try not to cry
spoke to my hand and then started to dream.
You came into my bed and i tied you up
we went underneath and i taught you the cup(?)
while people were watching how you and me breathe."

Good call! I can't believe I didn't think of that one.

Slightly off topic... but I'm a fan of music in the bedroom, I'd be interested in knowing what tops everyone else's playlist during those "special" moments (alone or accompanied). Not sure if there's another thread for that or not. Personally, NIN does it for me.