The Scientifically Conceived Titanium Alien Mixtape or What's Commonly Known As Music
 

Let's get academic for a while, shall we?

So there's this space shuttle on its way to the outer hoods of the universe, carrying with it chunks of information constituting an ark of cultural artifacts to educate the fortunate frenger of Alpha Centauri about mankind. Among these is a titanium disc engraved with ten clusters, five on each side, which when spun through a needle will greet this fortunate frenger with neatly arranged tonal and rythmic structures. Our frenger will thus be acquainted with what seems to be an important cultural phenomenom here on Earth, and he will most certainly build his understanding on this phenomenom entirely on these ten clusters of tonal arrangements. He has to; these are the only artefacts of the kind to be found on the shuttle so obviously the earthlings must have been taken good and meticulous care of picking out the ten different chunks of aural information in order to provide a thorough, albeit compromised, picture of its cultural impact on planet Earth.

Now, the selection process may or may not have been commenced by a certain group of amateur scientists on a virtual forum called Music Banter on which they gathered around the task through the force of their vast collective batch of knowledge. On their part the task was simple: Show this potential frenger what music is, nothing less, nothing more. Yet it was hard since there was no room for personal taste or anything, something that was otherwise a crucial part of their virtual interaction around list-type objectives (and naturally, everyone tried to pass on their own personal favourites in the process). Their collective result would be narrowed down to exactly ten tracks, all of which were mirroring not only music itself but human culture on a whole to which music was an inseparable part and none of which was to be taken out of account in the evaluation process of the alien frenger. Regarding the inhabitants he was representing, it certainly had to be taken for granted that whatever was on that titanium disc would be crucial in their understanding of our culture, so there could be no room for free interpretation regarding the overall image of mankind. We could definitely not risk an intergalactic war sprung from even the slightest grain of misinterpretation.

In short: The titanium disc had to contain ten of the most representative musical pieces ever composed and performed in order to provide an adequate picture of what music is all about.

Now, what would this track selection look like? Remember: Kill your darlings! No "all time greatest" or anything here, no personal favourites. Only the most crucial musical artefacts for someone who never ever heard of music in any form whatsoever.

(I'll refrain from coming up with any candidates right now and leave it up to you, to begin with).

I'm going to try to be as objective as possible here, but that's still going to prove to be insanely difficult. I've only heard a very limited amount of the particular songs the world has to offer, so I can only personally offer input through my own limited experience. The margin for human error is is alarmingly high. With that said, here are a few which I would consider appropos for such a compilation.

1.) Ludwig van Beethoven - Für Elise
My first reasons for its inclusion are its long term popularity, coupled with the simplicity of its being played on a lone piano. The melody itself is lovely, haunting, and completely non-threatening. It's extremely melodic, and I'll wager that 90% of the people you meet will be familiar with the song, if not able to identify it outright. As such, the impression it's made on humans is fairly undeniable. There must be something especially appealing about it. I definitely feel that its being included would prove a good selection.

2.) Queen - Bohemian Rhapsody
This particular piece enjoyed very widespread (and rather longterm) appeal. It's compositionally interesting, with some gorgeous melodies and harmonies and pleasing vocal delivery. While it stands to reason that aliens with have different concepts of what is pleasing as far as sounds go, this does appeal to a widespread human audience. It's not especially simplistic, but it seems that structurally, it would appeal to any lifeform with any manner of mathematical knowledge or appreciation.

I may add more later; everytime I try to think of a new one, too many arguments against its inclusion arise in my mind.

"Für Elise" is probably a good choice as it's one of the most recognizable classical pieces ever, as well as a good showcase of piano, one of the most commonly used instruments ever. I'm not as sure about "Bohemian rhapsody" though, not that it's not well-known (and a helluva song) or anything. Considering we've got to cover a whole mankind worth of music, we'll probably get a maximum of two or three popular music pieces from the western world on the disc, so that choice will have to be extremely profound.

The Beatles-A Day In The Life
The Beatles, being arguably the most important band in pop music would need a place on this mixtape. A Day In The Life is perhaps their most complex song and is loved in the eyes of fans.

I already called the dibs on pressing a Beatles track on the disc, we only have to agree upon which track. "A day in the life" is a good candidate, but I'd say "All you need is love" may be even more significant. Remember, we're not doing it for the fans, we're doing it for the aliens.

I always hated All You Need Is Love. It's repetitive. What about some Fela Kuti to show these Aliens some other cultures on earth?

Like I said, it's not about personal taste here. I'm quite tired of it myself but as a showcase of popular music it's quite significant. What's Fela Kuti? Sounds ethnic.

What makes All You Need Is Love so important? Fela Kuti is a very important African musician and political activist.

That's the question. It's well-known and culturally significant, but so are several other Beatles songs. I think that it's more recognizable than "A day in the life" though, even if the latter also happens to be one of my own personal favourites.

Full orchestra, conveys wide range of emotions, and is up there with the wheel as humanity's greatest.