How to Become a Well Know Musician
 

I have been singing with a jam band for almost a year now and we recently decided to try our luck with going public. So far we have played a few minor gigs at local bars and once at a local venue for a battle of the bands. We ranked third in the contest but didn't really receive any new contacts or gig offers. Can anyone tell me if there is a better or faster way to get well known? Are competitions such as "Americas Got Talent" a good option or should I stick to what I have been doing?

Fuck a supermodel

Play a lot shows and hope you get lucky. Jam bands have an extremely niche audience though so, uhh, good luck with that.

Produce the crappiest song you can think of. It worked well for Rebecca Black & Brokencyde.

Fuck Rob Fusari.

First of all, singers for Jam bands rarely become famous musicians (quick, name one that isn't Jerry Garcia or or Trey Anastasio). What you need to do is start making pop music, change your name to something catchy, like Lord Flibbity Flou, and start wearing slacks made of applewood smoked bacon. Posting sexy giant posters of yourself everywhere will help. Also try masturbating in front of cop cars that are stopped at red lights.

Fuck a goat.

Fuck a famous goat.

Either find a creative niche that not a lot of other people are working with or just be incredibly, incredibly awesome and interesting at something that other people do musically. My guess is that networking and becoming familiar with as many people as possible helps more than just about anything too.

Kill yourself or die of an accidental drug overdose.