yeah ive heard chewing gum while you do it prevents crying

You should meet me. I cry while listening to Umberto Giordano's "La Mamma Morta". and Paterna Mano (Verdi)...i have a long list of arias that kill me lol
i'm such a classical music geek

But no it's not a bad thing to cry every now and then. If he cries every other day, he's got issues he needs to sort out. Otherwise, well, whatever.

It's totally cool with me, If a dude feels like crying, then let him just give him some space and don't laugh at him. Just be willing to understand his emotion but be a friend to talk things through. Until he is able to smile again and says Thank you. It's such a rare feeling. :)

When anyone of any gender cries it triggers the Molly Weasley response in me and I have to cuddle them in my boobs and stroke their hair, it's weird

but I don't care, express emotion in whatever way you want, regardless of gender.
http://24.media.tumblr.com/4d840fdf2...c51io1_500.gif

Of course it's OK for men to cry -- should there even be a question about this?

I remember my former husband, who had a difficult childhood, used to cry to me quite often in the middle of the night. Those were the times I felt closest to him and loved him the most.

IMO what *isn't* cool is giving a rat's patoot if anyone thinks you're *not* cool by displaying honest emotion.

^ This song may be wiser than at first appears; it´s ok for boys to cry, but it´s best done discreetly.

nahhhhh

crying is apparently good for you.

I look like a spazz when I cry, so I don't ever do it, or at least I do it when no one is around, which isn't very often.

Cry if you want to cry, I don't give a ****. Frankly, I think shaming men for crying is counter-progressive. Feel how you feel. You're allowed.

These head movies makes my eyes rain. :(

Yes it is but I'd honestly freak out if my boyfriend let it rain! I can't imagine a Russian crying for some reason.

crying isnt a good idea unless its in private. last time i cried was a few yrs ago when one of my dogs had to be put down kinda of unexpectedly cause it hit me kinda hard. but that was in private.

unless its at a funeral or something. i think guys should keep those emotions in private cause i think guys need to be strong when others are weak

So by others you mean women? That's a little rough.

no, well kinda i guess


if everyone is breakin down the man needs to be the one who is strong and hold down the fort. be the keystone and hold things together in times of turmoil. if everything else goes wrong the man has to be accepting of the pressure and responsibility to be strong in the face of anything. thats what ive always believed

My dad is like that. Although I have made him cry, it was a total overreaction, I posted a picture on here when I was 18 with my Aunty and she found it and thought people would be able to suddenly know her address and come stalk her! So dad got really upset thinking that the world had ended because of a photo.

I understand what you're saying about men, but I guess it depends on the situation.

thats pretty funny lol. my brothers and myself learned that attitude from my father and it served us well. i think if a man is showing fear or weakness then it sets a bad example for his family if hes being a pussy. i might feel afraid or weak but i wont show it in front of others because if i would it would only make the ppl around me who depend on me more afraid. men should be protectors in my opinion. thats why i hate all these emo guys and hipsters cause they seem like pussies to me (even tho i do listen to emo music which is kinda ironic i think))

I understand, I think its an unfair thing though that men think they need to be unemotional etc. I think women should be strong for their men when its necessary because guys do have emotions, suffer from depression and experience loss.

My boyfriend told me off yesterday saying he has emotions too, but I was too busy looking at how pretty he is! *swoon*

What is this macho bullshit going on in this thread right now? Women can't be strong?

way to turn it into some kinda feminists issue or something


men need to be strong. you cant expect a woman to be strong. they might be and thats good but you shouldnt expect it because like i said, men should be strong when others can't be. its about stepping up to the plate when you need to. women are more likely to be outwardly emotional, its better to compliment each other instead of being the same

It's not even a feminist issue, it's just your misogynistic attitude and way of thinking in general but I'm not even going to get into it with you about this.

I wouldn't say it is cool as in "hip" for guys to cry, but it is a natural thing, which should have nothing wrong with it.

I've seen some dudes cry and I've seen chicks cry. Both are sad. The only difference is it felt like the guy had sort of tried NOT to cry for a really long time and it made more generally heartbreaking.

I didn't think he was a pussy, though. And I don't think women are weak, either. I just think women are more generally emotional (some) and some guys just don't give a flying **** whether they're looked to as strong or not. Like who cares, it's just crying man.

So why exactly should I expect a woman to be weak and a man to be strong?

Is it cool for a guy to cry? No. Is it cool for a girl to cry? No. Is it a normal, human reaction to certain situations regardless of sex? Yes.

Oh but you would say that. Just wait until you get married and your big, strong rock of a husband who has to be there for the little woman, through all of her hysterical crying, shrieking and giggling that presumably only comes naturally from being the emotionally weaker sex. :rolleyes:

its like the saying hope for the best but expect the worst


i think guys should expect that a woman will be emotionally weak in times of turmoil so it forces you to be strong. i think women are more emotionally fragiile jus tin general and i dont consider that an insult, just reality that ive experienced

just reality that you have experienced.

that's the key words

I've experienced strong women thoughout my entire life especially on my mother's side of the family and they are strong emotionally just as men are.

You are taking your experience and trying to paint a huge brush across all women.

nobody here has interacted with everyone on earth or even close to it. we all do that to a certain extent. my mindset isnt to bash women or paint them as weak, its more to have the mindset that men need to be ready to step up to the plate and be strong when they have to. ive seen that mentality work many times. and i DO think men are supposed to be protectors of the family

I know, right?! :laughing:

The way you talk about a mans responsibility to be strong "when they have to be" and "when others cant" does however suggest that what you mean is when women cant, and so paints women as weak

Do women cry more than men? Potentially. If so, does that make women weaker, or is it not just as probable that women feel it is more socially acceptable to do so without fear of being judged for it due to the stigma attached to it that it somehow makes you more of a man to hide your true feelings.

what i was trying to say was that im not here to troll and bash women because thats not my main focus. that main focus is the thought that men need to hold themselves to a high standard and be capable of being strong.

women are more emotional than men, and men are more rational though

What are you basing this on though? If you think women are more emotional than men then why? If you're basing it on all your belief that women cry more than men, then my point is you may be missing the real point being made here.

Just because women cry more (if they do) doesnt necessarily mean they are more emotional. It could just mean they dont feel the need to hide their emotions. I'm a man, and I will even admit that over the last few years I have started to bottle my emotions up more than I used to, and to be honest I'm starting to really hate the fact I do that. My emotions are still there, but for some reason I choose to try very hard not to show them to anyone.

im basing it on studies and what i thought was common sense. men = more rational, women = more emotional. and im defining emotional fragility as crying. and regardless of why women cry (probably biological and also social reasons) they are still more likely to cry which is really the only point that matters. so if a women is more lkely to cry (which i consider a showing of weakness) then her man should be strong and not cry

This is all I needed.

I also don't see how, in that scenario, the man not crying changes a damn thing but OK.

ok great


because i think a man should be a sign of strength as a role in their families and a father who appears fearless and a father who isn't going to cry in front of people when things get tough provides comfort

You've got to be so careful with that. I used to bottle up my emotions and trauma too and ended up with depression. I'm a lot more open now and feel comfortable talking to my friends and family about what is going on in my life. If I wasn't diagnosed with depression I might have become suicidal. I've had those thoughts many times but have got through every single thing I've had thrown at me, climbed the mountain of issues and stress.

I actually think I've read somewhere that crying can actually make you feel better after. But I'm not sure it does because I get into fits of crying for days and days through stress and anxiety. I have a lot going on in my life and in my families life which has really effected me emotionally but also spiritually and physically too with headaches, breathing problems/panic attacks and anxiety.

I think the point of what I'm getting at is that people are very complex as a species and I don't think you can really say that women cry more than men because there is so many differences about what's driving the tears. It's a bit sexist to fit a woman into the weak, fragile basket and the men being the strong, the unemotional basket.

I don't know if women cry more than men. It does seem that way, it feels as though that is probably true, and there may well be some studies somewhere to prove that is the case. I've never looked, mainly because I don't care to.

I'm more concerned with why that would be, if it is indeed the case, and I don't think you can overlook the fact that crying is an impulsive, emotional response, regardless of gender, and that a lot of men seem to try their hardest to hide that side of themselves. It probably isn't even an area you can accurately conduct any kind of study, because a lot of men will and do outright lie about their tendencies to cry and feel it makes them more manly to appear to be emotionless in that regard.

I may bottle my emotions up to a degree these days, and I'm not happy about it. I'm not even really sure why I do it. I rarely used to. It isn't always a deliberate attempt on my part to do this, it just seems to be more of who I have become now. I'm not a robot or anything, and I still don't feel the need to do it to make some inaccurate, bull**** "macho" point about who I am or who I aspire to be, I just don't cry a lot and certainly a lot, lot less than I used to.

Yeah, I can relate to that. I went through a stage in the past of bottling up my emotions as well. It's a really bad thing for me to do because after awhile I end up just exploding and everything comes out at once. The rage of emotion ends up being directed towards people that have no idea what's going on or why I'm acting the way I am to them.

I haven't cried in twenty five years when my grandfather passed away. I keep everything in not because i want to appear strong but I just don't feel comfortable discussing anything that would make someone else uncomfortable. I'm quite content though and haven't been unhappy a day in my life.