flamboyant funerals
 

I was asked last week what i had prepared in case i die. Funeral proceedings its no laughing matter, in my line of work two colleagues have been murdered so point taken.I haven't a clue something respectable with a touch of madness.Ive been to funerals and their so boring it never seems like your saying farewell to someone you know. Is there anyone with any good ideas on the matter i would be well appreciated thanx?

I want people to dance around in my flayed skin whilst drinking red wine from naked bodies as Slayer are being played over the P.A. Failing that I'm being burned to a crisp and chucked in a field. Who cares when your dead eh?

I've already decided I want cake, party hats, and maybe some balloons that say "Bon Voyage" or something. And everyone should wear white...or maybe some bright colors. And play something upbeat...maybe with a live band.

Then they can torch me and throw my ashes where ever...

As i dont really know very many beautiful people everyone turning up naked to my funeral it would be hilarious.Nice one il put that one on my list.Yes your dead, why does it matter. Well it would shock everyone if i bothered to sort it out and not leave it up to the living. And they might actually turn up because they didnt have to spend a penny lol.

Nick Swardson - Stamos funeral Video by D-Dub - MySpace Video

Nick Swardson FTW!

Actually what I was thinking of is in here. FF to 3 mins if you dont want to watch it all.

http://video.acasa.ro/view_video/f6e...-swardson.html

i wanna be turned to ashes

I would like to be stuffed with candy and hung up so the kids can use me as a pinata.

Smiles all around.

Bro, I went to a party not too long ago and they had a pinata filled with condoms, candy and one hitter keychains. You should go that route instead.

True.
There won't be many kids at my death party.

My funeral should be held at an americanized mexican restraunt that specializes in making over priced margarita's and should be attended by people in hawaiin shirts and sandals. A live mariachi band shall be present and playing the most upbeat tunes in their repitore. Chilled shots of tequila should be served at an open bar and toss a mini umbrella in the casket por favor.

Oh, wow. I have this all planned out. So, I don't want anyone, but my friends and fam to take care of my body. I'd like to be burnt (**** wasting land space). I want them to play a mix that I've already made and ****ing rage all night in celebration of life and love, not loss and sorrow.

I've thought about having a funeral for myself while I'm still alive. I mean, why do I want everyone I love and care about to get together and say awesome **** about me when I'm dead? I wanna HEAR THAT ****!!!

Also, my buddy had a craaazy idea. When he dies, he wants to be cremated and have his ashes mixed in with tattoo ink. Yes, you guessed it - he wants his friends and fam to get a tat with the dead-guy's ash ink. He looked into the sanitary aspect of it, and it's pretty solid.

Thats awesome!

Thats not (the tat idea)