This may be the only way to escape the madness that this album has inflicted on me. But then I can't listen to the album when I'm dead. See my problem?

I'll drop an iPod into your casket.

You know how to please me.

I'll have a molotov cocktail. Should make my funeral more interesting.

Be careful who you call ugly in middle school.

Setting you on fire is probably the only way to burn the fat off your body at this point in your life.

I still think we should try ten years of slave labor on him first, see how that goes. We are the world's greatest weight-loss program, gotta consider the options.

Not a bad idea. Though I don't think they have weight loss programs that require a man to sit on one arm and masturbate to midgets all day.

Fat shaming is always step one. You dirty fat worthless piece of unlovable garbage.

Amputation is our backup method of weight loss. If you sit on your arm for fifteen minutes before the surgery it feels like someone else is losing ten pounds in just seconds!