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-   -   Do Women Take Themselves Too Seriously? (https://www.musicbanter.com/lounge/55214-do-women-take-themselves-too-seriously.html)

Scarlett O'Hara 03-24-2011 05:48 AM

Do Women Take Themselves Too Seriously?
 
I've been thinking this through and I truly believe women worry too much about what others think of them. And I mean this in all aspects of their life. Their job, their appearance, how they act in society and being attractive to the opposite sex. There is a huge element of rivalry between women because of their own insecurities wanting what another woman might have but they don't.

I have really learned to let go of all that. I personally don't get envious of other women, merely because I think I was blessed with the attributes I have. I can be an attention whore but generally I love being silly and make my friends and family laugh. If I acted the way I did around my parents and my friends I'd never get a boyfriend. That could indeed be my insecurities.

But in general I wanted to say, I have often embarrassed friends in the past for not being afraid of looking or speaking stupidly in public. I love doing ridiculous things to make strangers smile like for example I went through the centre of my old town once in car making a skeleton head talk to people walking around on the streets. My friends were mortified.

Guys: do you find women ashamed of being who they really want to be?

Girls: are you able to let go of what others think and stop being afraid to look stupid sometimes? Do you rival other women?

An example of this is when women look incredibly sexualised all the time in music videos or the average joe in a club. Is that all there is to you? We don't see another side of woman enough in society and the media. Apart from dumbass blondes, reality TV retards and unintelligent politicians like Sarah Palin.

Guybrush 03-24-2011 06:13 AM

I think it's definetly a problem for many if not most women by far that they take themselves too seriously, but you're not the only ones! I'm horrible at being my honest me when I'm with others. I present myself on here, to my family, to people on the street, as someone who is a certain way (smart and proper, I like to think) .. But that's only part of me. For example, when it's just me and my GF, I love to goof around and sing songs for example, making up the lyrics as I go. However, I'd love to be the kind of person who dared to sing those songs while walking in the street if I felt like it, but I don't! If I were to do it today, I'd feel everyone's eyes on me. If I make a joke with my stupid sense of humour, if people don't laugh, I worry that they think I'm an idiot.

It's a bit sad because I'm not completely comfortable being me unless I'm alone or with very intimate friends. I hope I'll get on top of that and change in the future.

MoonlitSunshine 03-24-2011 06:32 AM

A number of my friends have commented on that fact that they've seen me walking around the city singing or talking to myself :P

As for women taking themselves to seriously... I think it's society in general, more than women, but that the female half of society are more sensitive to it than men are (in general).. Actually, make that the Feminine side of society. There is a modern obsession with image and conformity, to the extent that even the "rebellion" groups of teenagers all wear the same clothes and listen to the same music! Those who are actually different tend to be shunned as odd in many places.

Luckily, the area I grew up in is so full of insane people that people accept it as normal for people to be a little off the wall, and I think there is more of that in the world than people realise. I get the feeling sometimes that we're all pretending to be something else in a bid to conform, not knowing that we're all the same anyway behind the masks we put on every day... Hmm, there's a poem in there to be written.

To address some of your points directly:

Quote:

If I acted the way I did around my parents and my friends I'd never get a boyfriend. That could indeed be my insecurities
That's definitely your insecurities speaking. Sure, you might not attract every guy in the world, and you might have some think you're weird or whatever, but you have so much of a better chance of finding a guy who'll actually appreciate you for being crazy you if you let yourself be yourself. And hey, maybe in dropping your own mask you'll find that the people around you are hiding parts of themselves as well.

Quote:

But in general I wanted to say, I have often embarrassed friends in the past for not being afraid of looking or speaking stupidly in public. I love doing ridiculous things to make strangers smile like for example I went through the centre of my old town once in car making a skeleton head talk to people walking around on the streets. My friends were mortified.
That's fantastic :D I'd love to spend a day wandering around doing stuff like that, it makes people smile, it's different, and it's fun. If your friends were actually mortified, they need to loosen up a bit!

Quote:

Guys: do you find women ashamed of being who they really want to be?
Personally? No, but I'm in love with a girl I met on an Online game and most of the girls I know study Maths/Theoretical Physics, so I doubt they really fit the norm... I think there is often a reluctance to stand out, a little nervousness to be oneself, but for the most part, people are who they are here, at least in my generation. Those who try to pretend to be something else are usually noticed quite quickly and pitied more than anything.

I love it when people are true to themselves, and I know I am incredibly lucky yo be surrounded by people who feel the same way. But at the same time, I doubt that the only two places in the world where this is the case is a small group of acquaintences in Sheffield and the Maths Society in Trinity College Dublin. I think that a lot of the world is obsessed with image, but that in every society, there is still a group of people, even if a minority, who are intent on enjoying being everything they are. it's just a matter of finding them :)

Ska Lagos Jew Sun Ra 03-24-2011 12:20 PM

Women take themselves too seriously, and don't take me seriously enough :(

crukster 03-24-2011 12:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vanilla
If I acted the way I did around my parents and my friends I'd never get a boyfriend. That could indeed be my insecurities

tbh I feel the same way about getting a girlfriend, so it's not only women. Gotta be yourself though *shrug*

I don't think all women take themselves too seriously but I think generally a lot of women feel there's a lot of pressure on them to look nice and be nice etc that's the impression I get. I don't really care tbh like if pople are not up on the latest trends or whatever. I appreciate effort and it's nice when chicks look nice, I sort of lol when a girl is all like "omg omg gotta get my hair and shoes just right" it's cute lol, but meh I think it's a lot more interesting when people say what they're actually thinking instead of putting up a facade all the time i dunno


I think people in general are too uptight. Whenever I meet new people face to face I usually think "man they're probably as weirded out as I am to be around new people" so I crack weird jokes to lighten the mood, do funny things. I was a legend back at school as a joker, but the older I'm getting people are snobs. Maybe it's just the places I've been going who knows. Pisses me off and puts me in an anti-social mood, and then they start bitchin behind my back about how I'm anti-social. the ****s. There's all these unwritten "rules" and "certain things you cant say". Screw it man you gotta have a laugh

Sansa Stark 03-24-2011 01:06 PM

I think men take themselves a lot more seriously than women do.

starrynight 03-24-2011 01:28 PM

There are alot more male comedians than female.

Sansa Stark 03-24-2011 01:29 PM

That doesn't invalidate my point.

Janszoon 03-24-2011 01:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plum (Post 1024007)
I think men take themselves a lot more seriously than women do.

I am completely offended by this statement and shall stomp around with an angry face all day long.

duga 03-24-2011 02:15 PM

I hate to go into animal instinct again, but women presenting themselves in an attractive way is simply how our species shows off fitness. Both sexes have something like this. Women dress up, wear makeup, and are very self conscious about other females because they are the competition. Men try to act like badasses, try to act indifferent (showing that we have plenty of girls after us so YOU want us), and do general "manly" things. I don't think any of this will change.

I do think reality TV and horrible music videos have killed a lot of progress that women have made in terms of being seen in equal standing as men. It's one thing to do what you gotta do to "find a mate", but that doesn't mean we can't treat women like people. I feel like we have regressed.


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