Neighbors horrible musicians
 

Occasionally one guy plays the bass another the drums. They never play together. Different apartments. Both of them exactly the same. They just doodle. Never holds a beat on the drums. Never plays along with a record. Never practices fulcrum or any sort of technique. Never improves. Bass dude never plays scales, never plays an interesting baseline, has no technique at all, just random plucking away. Not any kind of free thinking randomness either. I know both these guys and they nothing about music. Why don't they at least try to create some sort of structure, rhythm, or something semi-musical? It's like they're in ****ing kindergarten. I'm no musician but if I wanted to I would start by practicing scales or something. Seriously. WTF?

What's up neighbour.

Was just about to post along the lines of "Imagine what Frowny's neighbors must feel like?" But the man himself stole my punchline.

:finger:

Why you don't you kick their ass like a nongay bitch

Your music is interesting and has focus. If these guys branched into atonality or abstract structure it would be different. Even if they took a punk I don't have to learn to play attitude that would be ok. These guys think they're learning an instrument.

They're just regular white dudes.

skin them alive

Be sure to hang them upside down first. That way they can't pass out from the pain because they'll have too much blood in their brains.

Seriously, it works.

what the

****

you're no longer invited to my bday party

You're definitely invited to mine: that's the entertainment sorted anyway! :)

Did you put on a sweater vest and boat shoes?

All my neighbors do is blasting sh*tty music. Have they heard of headphones? 'cause they need 'em.

Have sex with their dog.

This is the logical thing to do in this scenario.

talentless neighbors
 

In different apartments there’s one guy that plays the drums and another the bass

They’ve both been at it for a couple years

I don’t even think they’ve met

They’re both exactly the same. They dick around on their instruments but never play anything. The drummer can’t keep a beat and the bass player has never once played a bass line. I’ve talked to both of them and they definitely aren’t fans of the avant-garde if that’s what you’re thinking.

I’m not a musician but what’s the point of dicking around at random forever? Why don’t they learn some scales or beats or songs or something? It’s like they’re both ****ing retarded but they’re not. They’re normal intelligence. They’re just completely directionless with their instruments.

Even though I can’t play any instruments I feel like I could still teach them. Like bass dude, this is a scale do re mi fa so la ti do

Drummer kick your bass drum at a steady pace click the high hat twice as fast hit the snare every second time you kick the bass drum

I mean wtf???

Ive been banging my hands on my desk and knees for 20 yrs and i still suck. :(

I've had two housemates, one with a bass, and the other with an acoustic guitar, and neither could really advance themselves beyond playing a few notes of a few songs that they liked. I think they just do it as something to do, and to keep their minds busy.

That’s wigged out I wrote almost exactly the same thing twice

Like scary

Tell them that they are great. Build up their spirits. Book them a gig and let the harsh reality of life crush their souls, as the crowd berates them. Problem solved.

When you initially posted I thought that you had reposted from Facebook or something.

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ErXiu6p6ua...1600/olman.jpg

Not a bad idea right here.

**** me man I need to get a ****ing life and a memory

Hey, don't be too hard on them. They could be the next Shaggs :D

The Shaggs were the complete opposite. They started organizing everything into tunes from the get go.

I was going to say "I'm not your neighbor" but Frownland beat me to the self deprecating punch line.

my neighbor listens to new age rock...
he was actually playing "danny brown's - Really doe" yesterday...


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The drummer was actually playing a recognizable rendition of Walk This Way

I cried it sounded so nice

.

Become an avant garde whistler. I do that **** at work and everyone loves it.

You figure out multiphonic whistling yet? It's a bitch.

Yes, that is a thing I am familiar with and competent at. I do it often and skillfully and the customers hurl socks full of quarters at me in appreciation.

Humming while whistling is fake multiphonic whistling btw.

Start singing whenever they play.

Start singing "Baby One More Time".