Yes, having a child is just like "getting" Coltrane.....

Good lord.

Hey man. I'm sure the cat appreciated your concern.

That exchange was deleted. Carry on.

No. Getting Coltrane is more important than raising a kid. To me. Is that OK?

Do you think I should have been a father?

You might have surprised yourself. Neither of my kids were planned for what it's worth.

I agree with DWV, sometimes losing somebody that you cared for because they don't want to be around you is much more painful than a death.

About 12 years ago a good friend died. He was the same age as me, both 35. He was a haemophiliac and had to get a blood transfusion when he was a kid - unfortunately this was before blood was screened for HIV, and he became one of the only people in Australia to get hospital-aquired HIV. He was a great guy - knowing that his days were numbered he lived every day as if it were his last. I'm tearing up just writing this. He was a prolific singer-songwriter with a very dark sense of humour. Here is Baterz playing live not long before he left us:

Sorry about your friend. That song was hilarious.

I know you qualified that with "might". I think I would have worked very hard at it. But I'm so clear about it. I don't want one. I never wanted one. I wouldn't want to work hard at it. I've said to people exactly that clearly and heard I think you'd make a great father. The ****? What could possibly be a better indicator that you shouldn't breed than not wanting a ****ing kid? No matter how I tried how could I be a good father to a kid I wished didn't exist? My mind wouldn't change. I understand that because I was raised by a father who obviously despised my very existence. **** the kid I would have ****ed up. Why the **** would I do that to MYSELF? I wanted to listen to Coltrane not to some **** replica of my own ****ed DNA. Once in my life I wish someone would say Occult you're a ****ed up **** but at least you had sense enough not to have a goddamn kid. It's like one of the very few responsible decisions I ever made.

Occult you're a ****ed up **** but at least you had sense enough not to have a goddamn kid.

:beer: