I'd do a review

Sounds fun if there's any space left. So what'll it be, Britney Spears or Genesis?

It seems like I'm the only person who didn't receive an album. :/

http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l9...Kidnapped1.png

http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l9...kidnapped2.png

:clap:

Fucking brilliant.

Would it be weird to say I am so turned on right now? :D:D

Kudos man, kudos!

Oh, and expect to hear from Stacey-Lynn's lawyers... you just made a very powerful enemy! :jailed:

I'm actually looking forward to this series. I enjoy trying to figure out what each picture means.

For the life of me, I can't figure out the falling cows.

Not falling, floating ;)

Oh! Well, that makes more sense. I completely agree with your feelings on the album. I too am a cow, floating into the atmosphere.

Almost as if you had become a cow that was sacred? :yeah:

Today I went shopping & saw 3 music magazines in a rack.

One had Nirvana on the cover
One Had The Smiths on the cover
The other had Green Day on the cover

I laughed when I realised it was 2012

Greenday are still relevant unfortunately.

I don't know how you managed to find the perfect internet pic to describe the Sex Pistols, but bravo. :laughing:

I think I may have seen the greatest 'artist history' ever on Last FM...

Ramases and Selket
Ramases was the creation and alter-ego of Martin Raphael (sometimes known as Barrington Frost), born in Sheffield, UK. Formerly an army PT instructor, whilst involved in a central heating business in Scotland, was inspired to assume the mantle of the Egyptian Pharaoh of whom he believed himself a reincarnation, and take up a musical career.

As you do.....

While I was digging through some old CD's today I came across S*M*A*S*H's self titled E.P. from 1994.
'Oh, I remember this' I thought to myself, 'I bought this the very same time I bought Definitely Maybe by Oasis.'
Then I remembered the circumstances of me buying them.

I was in Gatwick Airport patiently waiting for my flight home reading a battered copy of Melody Maker after a Doctor Who convention (shut up), when I was reminded by the magazine that Oasis were releasing their debut album that day. So I took off and decided to go have a look for it. I'd already bought a stack of albums on the previous Friday before I spent the weekend in a hotel trapped with a bunch of geeks and Daleks and figured a few more wouldn't cause any harm.

I'd been reading about Oasis ever since the beginning of 1994. I remember seeing their first ever interview in Melody Maker written next to a photo session they did the John Lennon memorial at Strawberry Fields in Central Park.
Actually it wasn't the band that interested me in the slightest it was the photo shoot as I had visited Strawberry Fields just a couple of months earlier. So after all the 'Cool, I've been there' thoughts left my head I read the interview and loved how arrogant they were. I was so used to reading stuff with boring miserable indie saps who would mope around whining on and on about how pained they were and how they took it out in their music. Here was a gang of working class lads (much like me) who were saying 'We're gonna be the biggest band in the world', and I loved them for that. I bought the Shakermaker single & loved it. I also bought the Live Forever single and loved that too. I couldn't wait to hear a whole album.

Picking up Definitely Maybe proved to be easy enough, there was an enormous f*cking display of it with a rack holding about 1000 copies of it in the doorway at the airport's branch of Our Price/ HMV/ Tower/Virgin (I forget which, it seems to change every time I pass it).
Feeling rather disappointed that the whole escapade only killed off around 2 minutes I decided to see if I could find anything else of interest.

After several minutes or possibly 2 hours I excitedly found the S*M*A*S*H E.P.
Why was I so excited? Well I had just spent the previous year reading about them and how they were going to be the next big indie thing, totally oblivious to the fact that in my total youthful nativity there was no way in hell that a bunch of 3 skinny dweebs from Welwyn Garden City who had spent their youth listening to too many Clash & Manic Street Preachers albums would take over their local pub let alone the world. But that didn't matter because I had the next big indie thing (On Virgin Records) and I was the only person I knew who owned it.

I feel I should take some time here to explain the reason why S*M*A*S*H were being so hyped by the music press at the time.

1993 was a weird year to be a fan of new British bands. When people look back at the Britpop era they tend to think of it beginning in late 1993 early 1994 because that's when a lot of the bands started getting attention. But the truth is very little of these bands had anything in common and it wasn't until mid 1995 with the whole Blur vs Oasis thing that they began being lumped in as a 'movement.'

The music press seemed desperate to cling onto anything remotely British so they didn't have to feature just grunge bands all the time. Even by 1993 they had already turned their back on the whole 'Madchester' thing and Shoegaze, which they had spent the best part of the previous 2 years building up. I can distinctly remember bands like Chapterhouse & Ride getting absolutely slaughtered in the press during 1993 on almost a weekly basis for no real reason other than they probably just got bored of writing good things about them. there was Suede of course but they had already spent almost a year building them up and people were beginning to get bored of the mass coverage they got. Even the reliable Manic Street Preachers had put out Gold Against The Soul and did a tour supporting Bon Jovi which made many of the music press assume they had decided to go mainstream and the Manic's backlash in the press started, or at least it did until they put out The Holy Bible but that's a different story. The music papers wanted something new.

S*M*A*S*H were a part of the 'New Wave Of New Wave' a term forcefully coined by the music press to label a movement consisting of about 2 bands (These Animal Men were the other) who basically sounded like early Manic Street Preachers that they were desperate to get behind. Writing songs about drug addiction, suicide and the hilarious Lady Love Your Cunt which was inspired by the feminist writer Germaine Greer's book The Female Eunuch just made the press love them even more.

It didn't last long, maybe a matter of months. By the time their full length album came out almost a month after the day Oasis released Definitely Maybe the writing was on the wall. It got good reviews but not great ones. Music journalists just sort of moved away from them.These Animal Men who released their debut album the same month befell the same fate. It was just a stopgap until Blur put out Parklife, Pulp put out His n Hers, then by the end of the year you had singles out by Elastica, Supergrass, Shed Seven, Lightning Seeds, Menswear, Echobelly, Sleeper ...... and Britpop proper as we know it began.

Now it's hard for me to believe all this stuff happened 18 years ago already. As for my own personal tastes S*M*A*S*H stayed a favourite for a while but at the time I wasn't just discovering Britpop, I was also listening to dance music for the first time, I was listening to American bands such a Tortoise & Slint, I was listening to the what would later become post rock with early releases by bands such as Mogwai & Flying Saucer Attack. (I can still remember Mogwai selling their demo tapes & 'I Hate Blur' T-shirts through the Melody Maker classified ads). It was also around that time I began finding my love of Krautrock when I picked up Can's Tago Mago. After maybe a year or 18 months it was consigned to the back of my CD collection.

I do remember picking the S*M*A*S*H E.P. a couple of years ago while I was uploading music onto my HD and rather enjoying it.

As for Oasis I was dragged along by the hype for the next 3 years and I quite enjoyed it for a time. I was firmly in the Oasis camp for the Blur vs Oasis thing, but that was more to do with Blur putting out the God-awful Great Escape album than for any great love of Oasis. I knew Blur were the better band overall. By the time I heard Be Here Now I lost interest. I bought Standing on the Shoulder of Giants and played it maybe once. It was around that time that I stopped playing ANY Oasis albums at all. I also bought Don't Believe The Truth, or had it bought for me, I forget which. It's currently on the CD shelf still in it's plastic wrapping.

Looking back now liking Oasis made me feel like I fitted in because everybody else liked them and I felt a bit of 'Well I found them first and now everybody loves them so I must be cool... right?'. S*M*A*S*H made me feel like I was the only person that liked them and who gives a shit if I am, and that's a much nicer feeling than fitting in with everybody else.

I think S*M*A*S*H were more my band.

^^^

That reminds me of the time that some friends and I were sitting down at some Chinese restaurant, and some old man that we'd never seen before sat down at our table for no apparent reason, and rambled on about his interest in historical fiction novels for ten or fifteen minutes, and then left.

I want some pork balls with my rambling.

Did he happen to have a Doctor Who scarf on, and was he clutching a copy of "Definitely maybe" and muttering to himself? :D

Should it really come as any surprise to learn that I really like the Great Escape :shycouch:

Wait, so is it good or not? I've been eyeing it at the local CD store, and now I don't know. It's the only thing they have besides Think Tank, and now I don't know.

If a more cartoony version of Parklife is what floats your boat then go for it.
I mean I wouldn't call it the drizzling shits, Ive played it a hell of a lot more than Think Tank and some of the songs on it work pretty well live.

I just don't like it much as an album, it's a bit too long and a bit too cartoony.

Question Of The Day

Worst name for a band ever?

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Rising Power – Power for the People

Apparently this is a power metal album from 1984. I did intend to listen to the album and share my thoughts on this forgotten gem in a detailed & comprehensive review.......



Actually no I didn't I just wanted to post the cover.
Sorry.

Rating:
3 upturned fists .... Grrrrrrrrrrr
http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l99/urbanH/fists.jpg

Posting In The Style Of Other Posters

Each month I pretend to be someone else on the forum.


Hello youarelucky welcome to musicbanter. I'm sorry that you had your last 23 accounts banned and I'm sorry that profanity was used when you last tried to tell us about your wonderful kitchens. It would be nicer if you can share your knowledge of kitchens in a less hostile environment here and I welcome your contributions to the discussion on the forum should any kitchen related conversation where your much needed expert opinion would be much welcomed.

I had a look at some of your kitchens. Before I went to your website I researched what a kitchen is and it said this.

Kitchen - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

What is a kitchen

Also did you know that the surname Kitchen means Family Facts for: Kitchen

I often wondered if the actor Michael Kitchen had any ancestors in his family that worked in kitchens. I think a few culinary delights have come out of his family over the years

http://www.anthonyhorowitz.com/galle...17.JPG_595.jpg


I particularly enjoyed your White High Gloss Shaker Style Kitchen

http://www.solidwoodkitchen.co.uk/as...highgloss5.jpg

This looks very vegan friendly due to the peppers on display in it, or Bell Peppers or Sweet Peppers or Capsicums as they are known as throughout the world. I'm disappointed that you have what looks like a joint of roasted meat in the background. Have you ever considered using the peppers for a delicious healthier meal instead?

Capsicum - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia



I also found a lovely vegan recipe for stuffed peppers the other day, maybe you could try this instead of meat next time.

Recipes for wellness: Peppers, stuffed with vegan flavor - Washington Post

Gave me loads of wind but they were very tasty
Flatulence and Wind | Doctor | Patient.co.uk

I did find a video on youtube to show this but it's very distasteful and I don't advise long exposure in the face to methane and I hope that these people perpetrating these jokes thing seriously about the long term damage they can do to someone pulling pranks like this.




What are the main health hazards associated with breathing in methane?

I also found another video of a band called the Freak Kitchens. It's a very catchy tune but I didn't enjoy humiliation aspect of it as it has been proven in many studies that humiliation can emotionally stump a childs mind and cause lots of long term damage in the future




Embarrassing Punishments Hurt Kids, Experts Say


Your exciting discussion and enthusiasm on kitchens has name me really think about getting a new one, thank you for posting and don't let your 23 bannings for spam dissuade you from posting again.

This would, then, be an example of that originality that you spoke of earlier? Damn good job Urban, and you certainly have a quirky sense of humour. I would be interested to see a face-off between you and the Batlord as to who is the funnier --- let battle commence! :tramp:

This article really made me smile, especially your linked quotes and examples: a real demonstration of why it's called the World Wide WEB... :thumb:

My only disappointment is that you didn't include a picture of Lord Kitchener, preferably pointing and saying "Your kitchen needs you!" :laughing:

Great job! Four stars: I only fail to give it five because the "poster" it's directed at is probably never going to see it...

:laughing:

I must say, your journal has definitely been part of the inspiration for my journal, if not for the actual tone and content, but for it's random, who-knows-what-he'll-post-next style of posts.

He's mixing it up and I like it. :D

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Pataky Attila – Vilagslagerek Pataky (2000)

You're probably wondering why the fuck I'm listening to a covers album in sung Hungarian with an album cover featuring a guy with a bad mullet and clothes that look at least 15 years out of date by the time of it's 2000 release.

And to be perfectly honest with you the reason I'm listening to this album is because it's a covers album in sung Hungarian with an album cover featuring a guy with a bad mullet and clothes that look at least 15 years out of date by the time of it's 2000 release. I mean what do you expect me to listen to? Genesis?

Now I could spend ages ripping into this guys appearance and the really lame album cover but why don't I just go ahead and judge this firmly on the 'music' contained within. I don't like to normally do song by song reviews because they're usually an exercise in tedium but this is a special case (much I suspect like Pataky himself).

Believe (Originally performed by Cher)
When I saw the opening song to this album, in my mind all I could think was one thing..

"PleasebethatsongbyCher...PleasebethatsongbyCher.. .PleasebethatsongbyCher...PleasebethatsongbyCher"

The amount of damage this turd of a song has caused me since it's release in the late 90s is immeasurable. If you asked me which song I have heard the most times in my life against my will this song would be it. Although it did cause some hilarity once when a female co-worker with no interest or knowledge of any sort of music who was out with me one night went up to an underground hip hop DJ and asked him if he would play the song, and then wondered why he gave her a dirty look and ignored her. But I'm getting away from the point.....

It WAS that song by Cher, and I just LOVE Pataky Attila for what he has done to this song. He manages to attack the song with all the vim & vigour of a drunk eastern European builder doing karaoke at a wedding. It's just glorious how he ruins it with every syllable that manages to escape from his mouth.

It's just pure comedy and I love him for it.

I Need You (Originally performed by Leann Rimes (possibly))
I'm guessing it's a cover of her song because the only other 2 songs I could find with this title in my 30 second long search were The Beatles & N-Dubz. Maybe he could tackle N-dubz on his next album. It would be more interesting than this rubbish. I got bored of the song about 10 seconds in and skipped the rest of it.

Help Yourself (Originally performed by Tom Jones)
This is much more fun although it would have been much more fun had he thrown in a few more Tom Jonesisms into his perfomance although he does do a rather passable 'Woah Yeah' at one point during the song. The only thing that really ruins the songs is a lack of a proper orchestra and the song being performed on some really cheap midi synthesizer.
But then would you fork out money to pay a full orchestra on shit like this?

All Of You (Originally performed by I have no fucking clue)
At first I though our friend Pataky had a sex change but it turns out it was really a woman to help him do a duet of some mid 90s sounding cheesefest that could have walked straight off some Michael Bolton or Celine Dion album.
This got skipped too.

Still Got The Blues (Originally performed by Gary Moore)
All I could think about while I was listening to this song (which is sung in English by the way) is how come he can sing one song and only have a slight foreign accent (Steell got ze bluz) and yet the guy in the Scorpions can sing every song in English for over 40 years and sound like he's been doing it even less than this guy.
Maybe Germans have a stronger national identity or something.

The Show Must Go On (Originally performed by Queen)
I take back what I said in the last song. He sounds much more like the guy in the Scorpions in this which is a shame because hearing him pretend to be Freddie Mercury would have been amazing, this is in English too by the way.
By now I'm starting to get a little bored, that's 3 ballads in a row now. I liked this album better when it was mixing things up a bit.

The House Of The Rising Sun (Originally performed by The Animals)
Now I'm really bored, he doesn't even try here. There's some really shouty bits in the chorus he could have really attacked but he doesn't bother preferring to sound as bland as your average X Factor contestant.


Just a Gigolo (Originally performed by David Lee Roth (And probably someone before him I don't care enough about to find out about))
Now he seems to be trying a bit more again although he does come across like some singing waiter you see on some cheap package tour to Magaluf.
I feel like I should be eating Paella while I listen to this. The 'Bozdee bozdee bop didy bop' part of the song and interpreted by Pataky almost had me spit drink.

Mambo No5 (Originally performed by Lou Bega)
The fact he sings this in Hungarian and still uses the English girls names is both funny and a disappointment.
I'd rather have him sing it in English and use Eastern European names instead.
A little bit of Olga in my life
A little bit of Petrova by my side
A little bit of Branislava is all I need
And so on and on and on........

Livin' la Vida Loca (Originally performed by Ricky Martin)
I've never been to a Gay nightclub in Budapest before but now I've heard this song I kind of feel like I have and I need a shower.



All in all this album is total horseshit but it kept me entertained for a good hour or so. Which is more than I can say for a lot of albums.

Rating: 3 Mullets
http://www.faketeeth.net/catalog/mullets3.jpg

That was so funny that I almost clicked on the video. Almost. Maybe tomorrow.

Fuck me. I just finally read through your entire journal, and now feel inadequate. And I'm not just saying that. Trying to use Maddox to rip off Urban was fun, but I definitely can't maintain Urban's level of awesomeness, so I think I'm gonna have to close up shop when I've finished posting my back log of saved posts in my journal. Also, I have run out of ideas, which helps.

URBAN'S REVIEWS FOR PEOPLE WITH A.D.H.D.

This week

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Rex Holman - Here in the Land of Victory (1970)

What Nick Cave would sound like if he was..

A : American
B : Born 20 years earlier
C : A Hippy

Actually Rex Holman was/is a successful actor & this was the only thing he ever recorded, which is a shame because this is rather good (Apart from the awful final song).

Not surprisingly I know of none of these bands (I think I've heard of Dracula's Music Cabinet) but I'm going for Dizzy Bitch, purely to hear what you have to say about a band with a guy in it who seems to wear a skirt, stockings and suspenders! :D By gum, the music had better be good! Though I wouldn't bet the Irish national debt on it!

Anyway, that's my vote.
Just a thought: maybe you should give a quick idea of what each of these albums is like, as it's hard to choose if you don't know what sort of music you're voting for. Of course, you'll probably say that's part of the fun...

Ah yes, I remember I had fun once. It was awful! :laughing:

No. 4. Please.

Ditto. I looked up #2 and #4, but #2 sounds like a generic hair band just with an especially bad fashion sense. #4 sounds interesting though.

#3 or #4...lets go with the former. :p:

Part of me does wanna go with #1 though. I'm just curious what an album by Ron Jeremy would sound like.

I'll vote for #3.

3. Roger Troutmann - The Many Facets Of Roger (1981)

I like early 80's music...well some of it, not everything. I don't know who he is, or what his potential is as the best or worst out of the bunch. If it's anything like your "Rex Holman" it should be most excellent.