Eurovision
 

I’m no expert at defining what is or isn’t ‘POP’ but most Eurovision songs sound to me like third rate Pop. If for a moment we can forget the insane visuals Eurovision is addicted to I’ve always found the actual performances and composition way below the standards set by US, English & Australian rock/pop musicians. (maybe we could add Canadians but I’m not familiar with Canadian Pop). Yes, Eurovision has had some stand out performances that I doubt could be called Pop (Conchita Wurst for instance) but for me the hysterical applause Eurovision audiences respond to most of the songs with has me wondering.
I’m still struggling to distinguish some POP from ROCK. For instance Savage Garden’s ‘Affermation’ (below) is to my ears more POP than Rock. An I on the right track. OK, I know it’s weird a geriatric old twit like me wants to sort this out but I’ve noticed some posters here get really upset if you dump something in what they consider the wrong section of the forum.
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Sounds like a good thread to resurrect one of my favourite sections!

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Ah, Eurovision! Was there ever a more pointless competition (other than the X-Factor, of course!)? Every nation fights to compete, even holding trials within each country themselves to select the song to go forth and represent them, and whoever wins has the dubious honour of hosting the next year's contest. No prize, no real fame to speak of, no recording contract. Most Eurovision winners, let alone entrants, fade very quickly into the mists of musical history, although of course there have been a few notable exceptions, who have gone on to carve out a successful musical career on the back of their Eurovision victory. They are, though, very much in the minority.

I think the best comment on Eurovision was in the Father Ted episode “A Song for Europe”, where Ted's arch-enemy, Fr. Dick Byrne, is flabberghasted to find that his much superior entry has lost out to Ted's awful, one-note-one-chord “My Lovely Horse”, and when he suggests the contest is obviously a fix, he is asked why would the organisers allow a far inferior song to go forward and represent Ireland? He rather haltingly suggests that maybe Ireland, having won the last two times, can't afford to host it again and so wants to send such a dire entry forward that they will have no chance of winning!

Okay, it's comedy, but there's a kernel of possible truth in there. For most countries, hosting the Eurovision is more trouble than it's worth. It's a huge headache, logistically, politically and most of all financially, and there are few if any rewards, apart from the “prestige” of staging the event. Sure, it's good for the tourist industry of the country in question, but it's not like the European Championships or the World Cup, where the hosting country has the sudden influx of thousands upon thousands of fans from every country, bringing all their lovely disposable income with them! No-one travels to the Eurovision; everyone watches it on telly at home. So where's the point?

This is a question, of course, debated by men and women much more learned than I, and I will not attempt to unravel the mystery in these pages. Rather, this section is being opened to highlight some of the truly awful songs that featured in previous Eurovisions. Some were even winners! And just in case anyone thinks I'm bashing any particular country, my own little island will not escape my scathing satire, you may be sure of that. We have had some woeful entries, and the harsh spotlight of scorn will be shone with its fullest intensity on those, mark my words!

But to start this section off, here's a good one from all the way back in 1974. Don't ask me how it did, but I somehow doubt it won. Paulo de Carvalho (never heard of him? Not surprised...) singing Portugal's entry, “E depois de adeus”, which apparently means “and after goodbye”. Perhaps he should have stuck in a comma before “goodbye”...! Hey, let's be honest: I don't know the guy. Maybe he was big in Portugal, who knows? But this song is typical of the kind of sub-cabaret tripe they used to trot out every year for this contest, though in fairness, they haven't got much better these days. Enjoy!
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1974 --- Portugal --- “E depois de adeus” by Paulo de Carvalho

I'd just like to say that no American has ever watched Eurovision nor have they even heard of it. The only mention of it I've ever come across has been on this forum.

I don't a lot about Eurovision either (sounds pretty Unamerican to me :laughing:) but didn't ABBA emerge from winning that competition?

Yeah, there's a reason it's called Eurovision!
ABBA did indeed win in I think '75 or '77 with "Waterloo". Others also went on to have decent careers including (splutter) Bucks Fizz and I think maybe Daughtry, though don't quote me on that. Also our own Johnny Logan (who?) and of course the eternal Peter Pan of Pop, Sir Cliff Richard.

Going all the way back to the year of my birth (what a wonderful year, eh?), and a song from Denmark, sung by Grethe and Jorgen Ingmann, called “Danesvise” (I would hazard it's something like dancer or dancing, but my Danish isn't up to scratch I'm afraid!), which was actually the winner of the 1963 competition.

Sounds like something you'd hear Lili Marlene sing in a seedy World War II German nightclub, is what I think! Oh well, it obviously got the most votes so they must have thought it was good. At least the guy on the guitar - Jorgen I presume - seems to be enjoying himself!
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1963 --- Denmark --- “Danesvise” by Grethe and Jorgen Ingmann (Winner!)

Eurovision gets no press here. The reality/talent/gimmick show does nothing for me. I give full credit to the kids for putting themselves out for ridicule and shame by celeb and keyboard judges. I wouldn't have the guts to do that.

^ Actually, it wasn't so much a kids talent show kind of contest. Most, if not all contestants were already established artists in their individual countries, which only makes the quality of the material more embarrassing.

Yep, I'd happily keep it that way to preserve some dignity for the international reputation of European music. But that's just my opinion.

Do you remember misspoptart? I think it was her who used to open a thread for the competition each year; she had some fun choosing favourites and predicting the winners. I think I would have participated more if they also had the contestants running around a horse-racing track in swimsuits.

It's like the Olympics if no terrorist ever saw a point in blowing it up for notoriety.

You want embarrassing? You want "living in the last century"? You want to make fun of us island monkeys? Here ya go!