Libertine Intermission
 

here's the song, talk about it.

We beat around the bush,
But haven’t landed on any one
Definitive definition for
What it is we’re doing.
But the truth is blinding and
There’s no use in labeling
This mirage as reality,
We’re both adults we can handle
The plastic truth we’re living.
The time for unrealistic fantasies
Has long since left the ground.
So don’t lift up your feet,
Neither of us is looking for,
A saccharine flight of fancy.
Don’t look at this the wrong way,
Cynicism breeds a sweet molestation,
Such an indulgent taste of bitter honesty.
A welcome break from exhausting
Elation and picture-perfect hallucinations.
So let’s keep on track with,
This impetuous stimulant since
Good things must end, and
We’re on a shrewd incline.
Walls will fall and the remains will be
Too menacingly tangible to maintain.

I think tis very good nothing really to add the flows nice..

haha, wow i'd forgotten i'd posted this. it's still a work in progress, and i've been playing around with it to divide it into seperate verses and adding a chorus. i'll post the updated verision when i've got something more concrete. that said, anyone else have any critiques or thoughts on it?

anyways, here's the newest version, any comments?

We beat around the bush,
But haven’t landed on any one
Definitive definition for
What it is we’re doing.
But the truth is blinding and
There’s no use in labeling
This tantalizing mirage as reality.

Don’t look at this the wrong way,
Cynicism breeds a sweet molestation,
Such an indulgent taste of bitter honesty.
A welcome break from exhausting
Elation and picture-perfect hallucinations.

We’re both adults we can handle
The plastic truth we’re living.
The time for unrealistic fantasies
Has long since left the ground.
So don’t lift up your feet,
Neither one of us is looking for,
A saccharine flight of fancy.

Don’t look at this the wrong way,
Cynicism breeds a sweet molestation,
Such an indulgent taste of bitter honesty.
A welcome break from exhausting
Elation and picture-perfect hallucinations.

So let’s keep on track with,
This impetuous stimulant since
Good things must end, and
We’re on a shrewd incline.
Walls will fall and the remains will be
Too menacingly tangible to maintain.

Yeah I think it's really cool. I especially like the last few lines and like Misfits said the flow is really nice.

PS I like the life story you gave me! Although it's not true at all, but still it's funny.

thanks guy, anyone else have suggestions or critiques? seriously, be brutal.

alot of big words in this does turn me off it a bit. it just makes it seem less like something you're feeling and more of like a science report on the whole thing. i more or less just said the same thing to hobojesus in his other song thingy peace sorry for not liking some of it im never harsh LET ME BE HARSH FOR ONCE WAAAHH