Music Banter

Music Banter (https://www.musicbanter.com/)
-   Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry (https://www.musicbanter.com/song-writing-lyrics-poetry/)
-   -   Silence Falls Upon Us (Metal Lyrics) (https://www.musicbanter.com/song-writing-lyrics-poetry/36496-silence-falls-upon-us-metal-lyrics.html)

Frozen Angel 01-20-2009 04:08 PM

Silence Falls Upon Us (Metal Lyrics)
 
Silence Falls Upon Us


As we walk to the rhythm of falling snow
Our crimson lines shall not be traced

Brought down and left behind
Silence is all that falls upon us
No one around for miles
Cold, alone but pushing forward

Impaled upon thorny crowns
In search of deliverance
Only to be denied of being whole

There is no refuge here
Nothing to fill the hollows that we bear
Just to condemn the fallen

Brought down and left behind
Silence is all that falls upon us
No one around for miles
Cold, alone but pushing forward

As we await our destilution (drawing near)
Another falls defeated (down to the ground)
Knowing we are not heading home


I know the first verse is MUCH shorter than the second. But it was written to go with the guitar track I was given. I might make it longer later. I wrote this a while ago, and now I have trouble making sense of it. Or why I wrote of the lines the way I did. Maybe re-wording some of it might be a good idea...any suggestions? I don't swear in my songs, depsite some of the dark meanings.

Frozen Angel 01-20-2009 04:26 PM

nope, I remember what it means now...and what is about...hehe. been a while :)

PerfectRandomness 01-24-2009 05:52 PM

i like this a lot but to flow better with the rhythm, you probably should do some rewording.

Double X 01-27-2009 05:21 PM

I liked it - as long as you sing it correctly. Don't try to put a melody into it, this is the type of lyrics that would sound better independent from the rest of the music, if that makes any sense.

Frozen Angel 02-04-2009 02:25 AM

how bout if it is growled? ..and it flows fine with the song. :)

Lutherfish 02-05-2009 07:16 PM

Yeah, I agree. If it goes with the music, well you got yourself a song.
And growling it would work well with that idea.
Does your band perhaps have a MySpace or Soundclick?
I'd like to hear the song.

Frozen Angel 02-06-2009 01:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lutherfish (Post 591427)
Yeah, I agree. If it goes with the music, well you got yourself a song.
And growling it would work well with that idea.
Does your band perhaps have a MySpace or Soundclick?
I'd like to hear the song.

We dont have this song up on the net anywhere as of yet. BUT my band does have a few other songs up that I have posted lyrics to. Death Reckoning on MySpace Music - Free Streaming MP3s, Pictures & Music Downloads.

I could put this one up in a different place for you to hear if you want. It is in rough form with no drums in it, lol. but guitar and vocals are there.

Guybrush 02-06-2009 07:59 AM

Since you're probably after more constructive feedback than just "it's good" or "it sucks", I'll say that the first line doesn't really work for me.

Quote:

As we walk to the rhythm of falling snow
I see you use a lot of metaphors and then you can do whatever, but this semi nonsensical line seems a little out of place to me. As you know, falling snow doesn't really have a rhythmn .. and nonsensical metaphors should be more appearant, I think.

Other than that, I kinda like it although I've no idea what it's supposed to mean and that can make it harder to judge.

Frozen Angel 02-06-2009 08:38 AM

well then I thought everyone knew that snow falls slow, therefor it has a slow rhythm. It is apparent that you cannot decipher metaphors all that well.

Guybrush 02-06-2009 08:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frozen Angel (Post 591623)
well then I thought everyone knew that snow falls slow, therefor it has a slow rhythm. It is apparent that you cannot decipher metaphors all that well.

Actually, an ice crystal falls, then maybe it's resuspended if windy and then it falls again. It's hardly worthy of being called a rythmn. Obviously, you are talking about the collective rhythmn of all the snowflakes, but if you think practically, you should immediately realize at least two things :
  • With our perception of time, when it snows, snow hits the ground all the time so if it made a sound, it should be continous .. not rhythmic.
  • You don't really hear snow falling.
So there's your logical response. Put simpler, I just don't like the metaphor very much. There's no real need for you to be so defensive, I did write that I liked the lyrics, didn't I? If you ask for people's opinions and constructive feedback, don't complain when you get it.


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 10:05 PM.


© 2003-2024 Advameg, Inc.