Music Banter

Music Banter (https://www.musicbanter.com/)
-   Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry (https://www.musicbanter.com/song-writing-lyrics-poetry/)
-   -   poetry. (https://www.musicbanter.com/song-writing-lyrics-poetry/49175-poetry.html)

frontwards 05-02-2010 06:08 PM

poetry.
 
i tend to write in short, nonsensical bursts. i haven't had anyone read anything i've written in awhile so i thought i'd give it a go.

someday, these sinewy dreams will be disarmed.
we're just stringing along regret.
we've become that proverbial c*ck tease.
our skirts being chased by that spector of splendor.
those spirited aspirations we let drown.
i met a girl who let me bide my time.
she had two windy, moonlit lakes for eyes.
i'll dive in and keep sinking deeper towards the truth.

someonecompletelyrandom 05-02-2010 06:14 PM

Good. But I'd like a little more that goes in a more substantial direction. I can't quite grasp the concept of this one as is, but I like you choice of words and phrasing.

Stay up.


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 01:27 PM.


© 2003-2024 Advameg, Inc.