I Will Keep Your Ghost
 

I'm pretty sure on all of this whole forum, people do not like me or find me so peculiar that they're scared. That is okay. Some times I write a lot of ****. Here you go;


Hold me up and wrap me down
Don't spit and split my spine
The vertebrae uncleaned and dismantled
It was supposed to be unseen
Thanks for putting it up on the shelf
I'll lend you myself
On display for the world to see
Because you want to be me
I don't smile and certainly not versatile
See you can claim to aim
But I'm winning this chess game
So I'll let you take my spine, veins, and heart
You've definitely had them from the start
Bask in your pride and glory since this is your
Love story
After all this is you who now trips in another world
Engulfed with insanity
Do I even have to say it?
Vanity
So yes, I'll lend you my spine, veins, and heart
You've definitely had them from the start


Once, I woke up from a dream. My ex was in it in the house I grew up half of my life in, and she had this stupid smirk, that smirk that follows laughter....but yet she had the most beautiful hands. And she played guitar...

what genre would you consider this?

Other.

I know my boundaries, and won't categorize. But you can answer your own question if you want, man.

Trust.

Think about what the means to you. Is it just weird letters formed into a word called English? I’ve learned that it’s not just a word, but its an emotion. A lot think emotions are just being happy or sad or angry, no, TRUST is an emotion we can all not handle. Have you let yourself trust? Of course you have, you were raised that these older people you encountered were okay people and you (literally) looked up them. “Son, good job on that A!” or maybe “Just go up to that house, switch the money with the stuff” It’s the fact that there are people above you without your control who completely influence you into inevitably—corruption. It breaks.

I trusted my parental units with everything I had. I trusted someone who valued my life to get me out of the mess I was in. I trusted my dog Bowwow (he actually had the same name as my father and brother but that’s weird) to protect me from the creepy man who picked up cans at our house. I trusted the bus driver to get me to my destination so I can see her. I trusted someone to not tell a single living soul what happened to me that night. I trusted that man to drive me back home safely even thought he was drunk.

And you see, I was beyond irrational with all of this. I trusted everyone else but myself. But how can we trust ourselves when we are taught to from everyone else? Parental units, Foster parental units, drug dealers, teachers, so-called friends that maybe friends after all, siblings, strangers taken upon us because we’re cute for the day, people who get up and sing, or paint, or act someone so bold you wish you were them, or most importantly… words. This is all why it happened in the first place.

Trust is the most important thing you can let go of from yourself. Latch it onto someone, it’s not just about sex and bodies or words exchanged or blinking in motion or walking in step and grabbing the same vinyl in the record store. It’s not about exchanging keys and kisses or meeting their family or gaining one. Trust is so deep inside you, its in agony hoping to get out as it watches you pass your life. We’re not talking about how you trusted your parental unit to watch you while you climbed the jungle gym or how your high school crush watched you knock over some kid who didn’t deserve it. How you trusted your best friend to watch your potato bug while you got some more water for him.

Trust.

What does it mean?