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-   -   drowning (https://www.musicbanter.com/song-writing-lyrics-poetry/6272-drowning.html)

PerFeCTioNThrUSileNCe 05-09-2005 11:08 PM

drowning
 
this ones called drowning. our sound is similar to avenged sevenfold, atreyu, some killswitch engage influences




Drowning

with nothing left to lose
i take the dive in these cold waters
without the ability to swim
the waves crash, high comes the tide
i say one last prayer
before my lungs fill up with water
as i feel life slip away
as my vision begins to fade
i see you laugh as i drown

chorus:
you laugh when i fall
you smile as i go insane
you love it when i wince in pain
and now you watch with pleasure as i die

so i go down with the ship
without a lifeboat to save me
without a friend to help me
so i reach out to you
and scream your name
but you rejoice
when i take my final breath

my eyes grow dark
and darker.....
and darker.....
and it all goes black

congradulations
heres another soul
you had your fun watching it die
are you proud of yourself?

once again tell me whats good and whats not.

.angie. 05-10-2005 07:07 PM

i like this one a lot. i think this one is my favorite one posted in here. that is really good. nice work:)

PerFeCTioNThrUSileNCe 05-10-2005 09:37 PM

i should have said this earlier, but i failed to mention that i dont write these. my singer does. i play guitar and have written most of the music for them though. i do write some of the lyrics, and the next song i post will be one of the ones i wrote myself.

im glad you like them. our singer is an amazing lyricist. i guess we got lucky :ar_15s:

p.s. sorry for the slight misunderstanding.

riseagainstrocks 05-11-2005 05:09 AM

i hate the chorus. really cliched and just bad.

i liked the other one you posted alot better. this one has too much of the "she hates me and wnats me to die" vibe to it. lame and overdone.

your other song was good though

PerFeCTioNThrUSileNCe 05-13-2005 02:21 PM

yeah i noticed that too. by the time we finish that song, he will be screaming so much of it that you wont be able to tell what hes saying anyways. plus these are only first drafts. we will probably end up changing pars of both. if you have any suggestions as to what we need to change and possibly what to change it to, then please post them.


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