IT HURTS tell me what cha think please? (rap, rock)

[Mr Slogan]

IT HURTS
VERSE 1

IT HURTS
Young homie, when ya fall off ya skate board.
Or when ya cost ya team the game-n-don't settle the score.
IT HURTS
Baby girl, when ya fall off ya bike.
Or you can have everything, that u want and like.
IT HURTS
2 Keep all ya emotions balled up inside.
And all ya life you've been decieved and fed nothing but lies.
IT HURTS
When ya work 8hrs + on ya feet
And ya hustle to pay ya bills-n-4 ya kidz to eat.
IT HURTS
Everytime ya turn on ya T.V.
And ya still see our soldiers dying over seas.
I KNOW IT HURTS
When ya see a relationship, on the rocks and fall apart.
or a close knit family-removed like a weakend heart.
YEAH IT HURTS
When ya dough is low-n-you don't have no food.
Ya so called friends-n-neighbors-turn their backs and act a fool.
-N- LORD IT HURTS
At night-when ya alone and you wallow and cry.
The burning sensation, while ya rub, come 2 ya eyes.
-N- STILL IT HURTS
When ya lose ----the one ya love.
Personally, i miss my Mom- cause she was my dove.
I KNOW IT HURTS
When ya feel like ya talkin 2 ya-self.
Spilled Literature, wasted and placed on the shelf.
YA KNOW IT HURTS
When ya feel you have nothing left.
All ya choices-n-decisions and pains all you kept.

I wrote these pages straight from my heart.
there's 2 much going on, so i try to make a new start.
2 much pains benn rolling-taped-yeah recorded.
I'm bringing some love here, cause it has departed.
And that's the way Mr Slogan plans to bring peace.
This is to connect with an audience-that like me has felt grief.

yall holla and keep it real
tell me what cha think?

God Bless

[Fenixpunk]

that ****s well written. What style are you going for? cuz when i read it, it sounds very transplant/op-ivy influenced.

[Mr Slogan]

a staright foward path- so yeah transplant form.
thanks for the comment
was welcomed and needed.

[anticipation]

that totally doesnt suck. thumbs up for you my man.

[riseagainstrocks]

i dislike rap, but this tells a story like rap is supposed to do. yay. i like it.

[BabyGurl928]

Originally Posted by Mr Slogan

IT HURTS
VERSE 1

IT HURTS
Young homie, when ya fall off ya skate board.
Or when ya cost ya team the game-n-don't settle the score.
IT HURTS
Baby girl, when ya fall off ya bike.
Or you can have everything, that u want and like.
IT HURTS
2 Keep all ya emotions balled up inside.
And all ya life you've been decieved and fed nothing but lies.
IT HURTS
When ya work 8hrs + on ya feet
And ya hustle to pay ya bills-n-4 ya kidz to eat.
IT HURTS
Everytime ya turn on ya T.V.
And ya still see our soldiers dying over seas.
I KNOW IT HURTS
When ya see a relationship, on the rocks and fall apart.
or a close knit family-removed like a weakend heart.
YEAH IT HURTS
When ya dough is low-n-you don't have no food.
Ya so called friends-n-neighbors-turn their backs and act a fool.
-N- LORD IT HURTS
At night-when ya alone and you wallow and cry.
The burning sensation, while ya rub, come 2 ya eyes.
-N- STILL IT HURTS
When ya lose ----the one ya love.
Personally, i miss my Mom- cause she was my dove.
I KNOW IT HURTS
When ya feel like ya talkin 2 ya-self.
Spilled Literature, wasted and placed on the shelf.
YA KNOW IT HURTS
When ya feel you have nothing left.
All ya choices-n-decisions and pains all you kept.

I wrote these pages straight from my heart.
there's 2 much going on, so i try to make a new start.
2 much pains benn rolling-taped-yeah recorded.
I'm bringing some love here, cause it has departed.
And that's the way Mr Slogan plans to bring peace.
This is to connect with an audience-that like me has felt grief.

yall holla and keep it real
tell me what cha think?

God Bless

thats sick man, keep it up yo