s_k

I think we're pretty good, it's definitely not the schools or the psychical treatment that's not good. It's just that no boss feels the urge to hire someone who needs some extra 'attention'. They rather choose the path of least resistance...

You may find this hard to believe, but I know a lot, a lot of autists and they all keep running into brick walls of misunderstanding and failure. I am actually one of the most happy autists I know. The others are all fed up with life, sometimes suicidal, don't get out of bed. Yes some of them do have jobs, but they don't have a life anymore. It's awful to look at. I am pretty satisfied with what I've achieved so far and I don't mind that these achievements are not on paper and not on my paycheck.

I like to think I am. I get told I am. I can't really say for myself.
But thanks. I sure wish you lived in the same country as I do .
Right, now I'm going to tell you something that's going to sound ridiculous, but this is the way I see it, from experience. I think you can better be someone who's obviously autistic or has down syndrome or something like that, than 'seem' normal. Aspergers is probably the worst form of autism for the person who has to live with it. You seem normal, but you keep having problems that don't seem to match with your level of intelligence. I'm not the prototype mathematical autist, if you know what I mean. So I'm not on autism forums myself. My ex-girlfriend is and the stories you hear are gruesome. Really nice and intelligent people get locked up in mental facilities because they just go bezerk. These people have finished high school in the highest level (it works a bit different here, I guess) and are very capable to have a good conversation, but they keep running into problems because, since they come over pretty normal, people expect more from them than they can deliver.
If you drool and pee, people don't expect anything from you and people are confronted with your disability all the time. In my case, people don't get confronted with my disability until it's too late, and that's the whole problem. I cannot imagine this is not the case where you live. Yes the 'classic' autists get all the help they need, but the 'not so obvious' ones have to struggle through live themselves.
There isn't even a real program here for adult autists. Just for kids. And I know from what I've read that this is a world wide issue.. It seems that when you've turned 18, people think "He got so far, He'll manage". But life only gets started by then...

Well I've got my life back on track, completely. Being able to function quite normally in an environment I shape myself. It's a pity though that there's still people who think I'm making stuff up. It's a vicious circle. If I do what's life expects from me, I get in trouble. If I do what I can do, people will call me lazy. It's been like that forever.

Ask anything if you feel like it. That's allright.
You're not going to make me agree with you, I've been doing this business for a while now . But if you have any questions, even if only for your own education, feel free to ask. I really don't mind.

I'd like to add; This is a lot of text and I really had to try hard to write in English and keep my thoughts together. I may seem a bit harsh about the down syndrome people/classic autist people but I really don't mean to be.
I've worked with them myself for three before I got fired for no reason (with those awful words: We have more work on you than we have on the people with down syndrome... Yeah, great man).
These are strange things you know, everyone I worked with blocked me, they turn their heads away when I meet them and the one girl I am still in contact with says the stuff they say about me is too awful to be true. I'm treated like a criminal but I have no idea what I've done wrong.
I think it's pretty logical that I'm not looking for a 'regular' job right now. These things really destroy you. By the way, the 'reintegration facility' we have here for people who can't get a job the 'normal way' told me they couldn't help me. I am, and I've got this on paper 'unemployable'.

Still here...

Yeah that's kind of my plan.
Sort of tough as there's so much people I really like a lot.
I'd love to hear more about their lives. But apparently I should be less open about myself, which I can't. It's always one or the other with me. There's no 'middle'.

Why do they bother writing it down then?
Point is, this is the only thing you can get me with, because I've heard it so much in real life it has become something I fight against. It's hard to ignore.

I know you're right. But I can't. So I think I should just turn to the music sections.

When I look around me and see how lonely most people are, I really do strive to gain acceptance. This is easy in real life as I'm very well capable of keeping 'good' and 'bad' people or groups apart. It's just that this isn't possible on a forum. And it definitely wouldn't be the first time I left a forum because of one or two persons getting on my nerves.
I mean, I could say you're right. But say I can't just NOT feel sad about the stuff that is said. Then what should I do? I mean, even if I don't respond to it it hurts me just the same.

Well, to be honest. None of this is my fault .
It's not like I asked to be born with autism.

It's a bit double. I cannot blame myself, but I cannot deny that the problem lies within me.

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