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Originally Posted by slappyjenkins
If only more women were like you. And guys too. Then we'd all be better off. I have to go out for a bit, but will be back later and I promise to review some more of your lyrics/poems. Been looking through your work and like I said there's quite a lot there. I also analized my last critique and realized that I didn't offer much in the form of suggestions or constructive criticism. I guess its hard for me to look at someone else's work and point out changes to be made. I figure your work is presented in its present form because that was where you got to at the end of the creative process...so it feels like hallowed ground. I guess I have to be brave and give my criticism and pray you don't take it personally. You were able to offer me great suggestions without stepping on my toes in any way, that is an art form and a bit of poetry in itself. You have a great underlying talent there!
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Thank you, slappyjenkins, for saying that you feel my relationship philosophy is a good one.
I was thinking today about my "used" vs. "user" comment and decided the best summary of my life philosophy or ethical system would be this: I do not want to use anyone (human or non-human animal) as a means to an end. For example, I don't want to laugh at people (using them for my amusement), befriend them for monetary gain, use them as emotional punching bags, eat them because they might taste good to me, etc.
Thank you for your thoughts you've shared over in my thread. All your comments and questions are helpful to me, whether you are noticing lines of mine that you don't like or ideas you wonder about.
Believe me, my lyrics and poems aren't hallowed ground. I've torn them apart and changed them so often myself that I'm always willing to make more changes. So no worries: I won't take and haven't taken your criticisms personally. I appreciate very much and feel honored, truly, that you have used your tiime to think about my thread and to tell me your thoughts so honestly and humorously (such as when you described Chester the cat leaving a mouse on your chest! lol! No wonder he was named "
Chester."
).
I love critiquing people's writing, so I'm glad you feel I did a good and painless job of it with yours.
I will reply later to your posts in my thread when I have more time. Thank you again for them.
But now I have a question for you about your story you are writing (and I agree with Trollheart that I feel you could modify the title,
Invasion: Hell, to make it stronger).
When I read this...
Quote:
Originally Posted by slappyjenkins
I am trying to dip my feet in several genres right now; a little bit of horror, sci-fi, comedy, poetry.
I'll give away the plot to one of my stories that's about ready to go. A spec-ops agent, named Jack, is a very bad man who does bad things for the government. He is privy to all the latest tactics and technology. He cold and ruthless and very skilled. Well he underestimates a target and is killed. When he dies he goes to hell for a few seconds. He sees that the realm he is in reacts to his thoughts and fears. The environment changes based on his own thoughts, his personal hell as they say. He is attacked by demons and he fights back vainly. He's holding onto a piece of the demon's tattered clothing when he is revived. Instead of being terrified and doing the right thing which is turning his life around he decides to turn this piece of cloth over to his superiors to develop technology to open a portal to hell and weapons that will work in hell. The rough title right now is INVASION: Hell. It's a romantic comedy....no, no it's murder mystery....ok you got me, it's horror based.
I did this story just to have something in horror, I'm not a devil worshipper or anything like that. I like how it turned out though, some scurry shiet in there.
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...I started to imagine what happens *after* the invasion of hell (I'm assuming it is successful). I wanted to tell you the ideas that came into my mind, because I thought you'd like to hear how your brainchild affected someone else's imagination. I wondered if you'd like me to tell you the thoughts I had about your story here or by private message? Since this is your poetry thread, would you prefer not to discuss your prose here?