Quote:
Originally Posted by Burning Down
I think a lot of men don't like women to court them because they might feel emasculated in some way. This is something that society has engrained into them and I wish it would go away. So:
a) A woman who'd like to ask a man out probably won't, because he might get scared off by her aggressiveness even if he's interested. So yes, there are probably more women than you would think who want to initiate a date or a relationship, but most of them won't act on it because women are not wired to be the dominant "chaser", if you will.
b) Men are biologically wired to take care of their mate and provide for them. So when the opposite happens they don't know what the fuck to do, and they back off.
I can't say that this is totally accurate, but it's just based off stories from people I know, things I've read about dating on the Internet and in books, and my own experiences with trying to ask people on dates.
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Probably at least partially accurate. I think in addition to this, women acting aggressively/asking men out is stigmatized as 'desperate' behavior. Even flirting too aggressively can earn a woman this label.
I think the explanation for this is that women compete as passive selectors in the same way that men compete as active aggressors. It seems that the mating ideal for a woman is to be able to attract the man she wants without actually going after him, and not being able to do this is counted as a mark against her.
As for why that is... women might use this stigma to keep sexual rivals in check, and since the rule of thumb is men = aggressive women = passive, men might misinterpret an aggressive woman as a desperate woman, which they would link with a lack of confidence, which is a turn-off for either sex.