Originally Posted by BlueEyedSuicide

The scene was a tiny mountain village in a remote section of
West Virginia. An old mountaineer and his young wife were
getting a divorce in the local court. But custody of the
children was a problem.

The mother jumped to her feet and protested to the judge that
since she had brought the children into this world, she should
retain custody of them.

The old mountaineer also wanted custody of the children. The
judge asked for his side of the story and, after a long moment
of silence, the mountaineer slowly rose from his chair and
replied, "Judge, when I put a dollar in a candy machine and a
candy bar comes out, does it belong to me or the machine?"