I also failed to mention that I have the smallest bladder in the entire world, I quite literally take a piss every half hour. If I am at a bar drinking beer none of my friends will sit beside me because I have to get up to piss so often.
When I drink Whiskey I have a tendancy to piss everywhere but the bathroom, one time my wife caught me holding my hand in the shape of a circle and when she asked what I was doing I looked at her like she was stupid and said " I'm pissing into a cup "
