Originally Posted by Veridical Fiction

*ring* *ring*

"Hi, Miss Savannah, we're calling to ask if you're satisfied with your dog's life insurance policy. We know he's getting old and he's bitten like, 3.5 children in the last two weeks. We're pretty sure someone's going to kill it. Like, the state.
Go ahead and pay us more money so we can provide it a proper burial."

I dunno.
****, I'm trying to cook steaks here.

soooo demanding.
lol.