[Misguided Allignment]
Just a little poetic bit. Give a little feedback to little old me, will you? The world can't handle much without something to recognize its existence, [after all].
MISGUIDED ALLIGNMENT
I leave a dream, and enter a dreamer's world
I leave a shadow, and it grows up to be me
I call the birds, and they fly the other direction
I cast a stone, and the splash reaches Jupiter's sea
Riding a wave is like riding your soldiers to war
Losing a life is like losing a game, only sadder
Running a race is like leaving the planet behind you
Burning a flag is like torture when it doesn’t matter
Give me some knives, and I’ll carve you a statue of love
Give me some hate, and I’ll carve you a statue of knives
The final hours, you realize, are only a goal
And the ending you’ve dreaded your whole life arrives
Mirrors are lying to you only if you distrust them
A rainbow in Heaven is monochrome if you are blind
Railroads are only a boundary for greater adventure
And leaving a world somewhat crumpled on paper behind
----
The 1st and 2nd verses are my absolute trump cards, whilst the 3rd and 4th get a bit sloppy for my taste. All in all, I'd give my own piece a [generous] 8.5/10.
Feedback in
3
2
1
__________________
[ there was a time / I would have just ran ]
|