Quote:
Originally Posted by VeggieLover
My newest song called "Beauty Burns"... this one actually has chords and not just plinking! there is a brief Beatles reference...
Beauty Burns
Autumn leaves they whisper
Soft goodbyes,
To the trees that held them tall
in the summer skys.
But we, we hardly notice,
There's no suprise at all.
No one tries to catch them,
We just watch them fall.
A new and fragile blossom
Wilting in the rain,
Blinks tired eyes, taught to disguise
Her own and others' pain.
But we, we just won't notice
There's no suprise at all.
No one tries to catch her,
We just let her fall.
Leaves must drop, and flowers bloom,
just to wilt away,
But beauty could be burning,
and we'd just turn away.
would you just turn away?
Who is now?
When are they?
Wither are we going,
and is there still a way?
Who is now?
When am I?
Wither am I going,
and how's the way to cry? To cry... to cry...
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Hi Veggie,
Your song describes someone numb to the world, unable to acknowledge her own pain (or feel others) and thus unable to appreciate positive emotions about the beauty of nature and life around her.
"Beauty burns"--I expected this to refer to the ability (to sense beauty) burning away until one can no longer sense the beautiful in anything. In your song, though, the phrase appears to be saying that beauty is so brilliant, it is as if it were burning...so brilliant people should be able to see it. I would have perhaps liked to see more references to burning that describe beauty being so brilliant that it almost burns, and to describe how people lose the ability to appreciate beauty...a second meaning of "beauty burns."
"Wither" as in "wither am I going."
I know you like old-fashioned words. Once again, though, this word jumped out at me as archaic. I'd prefer "where," although the question of "where am I going" seems very commonplace.
"Who is now. When am I." Interesting inversion of the usual questions, which would be "When is now. Who am I."
"How's the way to cry? To cry...to cry" line sounds melodramatic to me, even if that may be how it feels when one (you?) is feeling this question and trying to let the feelings out. I know you mean that the person is trying to figure out a way to feel her pain, to acknowledge it and let it out, so that she can feel the beauty of life, too, right?
Tiny correction: "su
rprise" needs the first r.
~ Erica