Hypothetical: You're the sole beneficiary of a will
 

Your eccentric Uncle Eggnog Rabbit-Proof-Fence Carrington-Smythe Junior III (born Herbert Morris, but like I say, he was eccentric) has died, naming you as the sole beneficiary of his will.

You get: Fifty million in cash and a huge mansion with its own extensive grounds.

Conditional upon you receiving this windfall is that you are to a) live in the mansion and nowhere else (you can't sell it, rent it out or invite anyone else to live there with you) and you are to have, from the point you sign the contract, no face to face contact with another human being as long as you live.

You can talk to people via telephone, on the internet (though NOT Skype, at least not with webcam: you are to have no face-to-face contact with another person), and you can write to people if you wish. You will have an extensive staff at the mansion, who will ensure all bills are paid, that the house is maintained, and they will also prepare and serve your meals, though they will never see you and you will never see them.

For dire emergencies, such as hospital visits, dealing with the police etc you will be provided with one member of staff who will act as your go-between and will deal with the relevant authorities. YOU are to have NO contact with anyone, even in the direst of emergencies. This "mouthpiece" will not facilitate you at funerals, weddings, christenings etc: you must avoid all of these.

Should you break the terms of the contract, all your assets will be frozen and seized by your late uncle's lawyers, and you will be required to pay back any of the money you have spent. So you can't try it for a year or two, decide it's too much and change your mind. Once you're in, you're in, and if you turn it down you can never go back and try again.

Think carefully before making your decision. Is having all that money and a cool house worth breaking off all contact with your fellow human beings? What would you do?

Obvious answer is yes take that £50m and live in the mansion. Use your time to make enough money with the 50m to move out.

Then they can have their mansion and £50m back.

This is the correct answer because there was nothing there saying I can't use the £50m cash to make more money.

I would just make my friends wear masks.

I get paid to avoid human contact? I do that free. Total yes.

Good answer. Like it.
No; face to face isn't to be taken literally. You just cannot be at any time in the presence of any other human, other than for the explicit emergencies mentioned in the OP. Nobody can visit you, nobody can live there with you apart from your staff, whom you'll never see. You cannot leave the house, though you can walk in the grounds, but on those occasions the staff must be pre-advised to prevent you accidentally encountering say a gardener. The walls are high and there is no chance of meeting anyone from the outside. You will be alone for the rest of your life.

You can't change the rules if you're dead, uncle john. Mask to mask bitch.

Not changing the rules. You just misinterpreted the phrase. And it's Uncle Eggnog. Anyway, it's in the hands of his lawyers, and they will ensure that his wishes are carried out.

And my answer to that question is that I would win the case on my uncle's poor wording and walk away with 50 mil and a masked posse.

Too easy.
Loneliness, isolation and lots of money = one hell of a depression

I want 500 M and another 20 M per year

Too easy to burn through 50

I knew this would be you. You wouldn't even have to say thank you for the pizza: it would be delivered to you and the remains (if any) taken away without any human contact being needed. Your utopia, yes?
No, you wouldn't. These are some of the highest-priced lawyers money can buy. Any man who can leave fifty mill and a mansion can afford the cream of Harvard Law School, or whatever.
Very true.
Sorry; you'll have to remain on the poverty line with a mere fifty mill. Maybe you can start an appeal?

Anyone who wishes to can consider this their chance to pose questions about the will. Essentially, you're in the solicitor's office and can ask what you want before signing. Or you can just grab the deal as is.

This kind of arrogance will be what wins me the case. Contracts are literal as ****, sloppy writing is to be interpreted as such.

Take the 50 mil, give each of your uncle's lawyers a bribe to get them on your side, and then walk away with the rest.

Do the terms of the will include police payoffs so they won't show up at your house and arrest you face-to-face if you hire a hitman online and have him record a murder for your own sick amusement?

Is payment for the staff and the mansion upkeep already paid or is it taken out of our 50 M?

Arrogance is what gets lawyers up in the morning. They'll eat you alive.
These people are unbribe-able. Steps have been taken to ensure it is so. Nobody's quite sure which of their relatives have been kidnapped, but let's just say there's a cabin in the woods somewhere, with a man who spends his evenings promising his AK47 "Soon, my pet. Soon ...."
You're free to do as you like with the money. Whether they will decide to double-cross you and report you after/before the murder, I can't say. That's a chance you'll have to take.
It's already paid. Uncle Eggnog made his money in Trump futures and this fifty mill is a drop in the ocean compared to the rest of his estate.

This isn't very realistic.

Can I have a sexbot?

It's hypothetical. What's unrealistic about it? Ain't you never watched Brewster's Millions? ;)
You have fifty mil. You can buy whatever you want. Maybe one that looks exactly like Harley Quinn, if you want.

Can we be test subjects for the singularity?

Sure. Why not?

Can I have robots with real human skin, a kind of erotic Silence of the Lambs thing? That would include a literal face.

I repeat what I told Batty. You got fifty mill, I'm sure someone out there can make it happen.

So I could get away with the money and hide my identity really easily.

I'm not that far gone. Just give me one that looks like post-mortem Marilyn Monroe. And I also want a robotic Chinese parade dragon to wander throughout my mansion at all times of the day and night. Silently. And it'll actually try to eat you. Not even I will be safe from it.

that sounds so beautiful I want to cry

gimme
gimmemansion
n
moneys

What has that to do with anything? :confused:

Yeah. This is what I was thinking. Take the money and flip it various ways through different investments. Take the profits and move out afterwards with just the profits alone.

If that wasn't allowed. I straight up wouldn't do it.

Sounds wonderful. I could fill the mansion with exotic pets (and horses--assuming one can go outside) and maintain multiple intense letter correspondences, just like Lord Byron. (If I had enough animals, I could probably remain relatively sane and happy) And if I needed meds to help with the inevitable craziness, I'd just order them from an online pharmacy. If those eventually stop working, I'd give in and acquire two or three robots. We could start a band. (Oooh, one of the robots could be like one of those old Victorian-era automatons that played the harpsichord) Ideally ones that could speak and run errands for me. I realize I could have my employees run errands for me, but I'd much rather a robot (or trained raven) do it. (I'm imagining a hyper-realistic humanlike robot-- wearing a shawl and sunglasses-- wheeling into a 7-11 in an electric wheelchair and knocking over various displays and small children while attempting to grab the specific candy bars I requested. And then just zooming away without paying.)

I imagine the biggest struggle (aside from the social isolation) would be actually using all of that time and money somewhat productively as opposed to just playing video games/watching netflix and ordering weird stuff on ebay all day.

You can indeed go outside (the house has massive private grounds) but alone. Your horses will be cared for and prepared for you by your ostlers, grooms etc but they will not be present when you go to the stable to mount up. You can have all the animals you like: you can also, if you so wish, contribute large sums to animal charities, or any other charity you wish. You can shop online and your delivered goods will be brought to a specific room in the mansion set aside for that purpose.

Or, knowing you, a suite of rooms! :laughing:

I love the idea of the less-than-perfect smash-and-grabatons! :thumb: You can just imagine the conversation: "Hey! That robot didn't pay!"
"Oh yeah, that's one of the robots belonging to that odd woman who lives up at the big house on the hill. Don't worry: she always wires the payment later, including any damages. Bottle of Jack, was it? Hmm: looks like the robot took the last one..."

Point of interest: what's that Russian-looking sig of yours mean?

Drugs aren't free. And don't gimme that oh but it grows in the wild BS because we both know the good **** was cultivated in someone's basement.

And what are you going to do once you find it? Just chomp it?

My point still stands.

You'd have to extract it. It's pretty simple tbh. BUT NOT FREE. SAD!

It has its place. I think shrooms are my favourite.

I propose a third option: You can keep the money and interact with people, but you are required to live in Florida and can never leave.

That sounds like half the fun tbh.

i knew there was a reason we get along.

Oh, ok. I just didn't get the relevance originally.
Or in the jungles of Colombia...
Even Uncle Eggnog would not be that cruel!

Oh, it's Greek actually-- it's an epithet of Hecate meaning "goddess of the lower world wearing golden sandals and drinking blood".

And yes, I'll need a suite of rooms for my gramophone collection and miscellaneous hoarded ephemera, definitely.

Oh and I'd have lots of pet servals because look at them:

http://media.mlive.com/news/baycity_...e176_large.jpg

Is it legal to send spiders through the mail?

I've wondered this many times. Who wouldn't love surprise spiders in their mailbox? I'm sure it is legal; after all, on Amazon you can get boxes of earthworms and cockroaches etc delivered to wherever.