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-   -   Opting Out Of Parenthood (https://www.musicbanter.com/current-events-philosophy-religion/92840-opting-out-parenthood.html)

music_collector 08-03-2022 06:23 PM

It's definitely not a split second decision. As a man, I wouldn't take that decision lightly either.

In our case, deciding to have kids took a lot of thought, given the ordeal we went through (IUI, in vitro). There was a big emotional, physical and financial cost.

Carpe Mortem 08-03-2022 06:36 PM

I'm sure it took its toll on you, but you're probably superior parents because of it. Too many people just fall into parenthood because of an accident & their feelings on abortion - and too often their children pay the price. Your twins are fortunate to have parents that clearly wanted and love them very much!

Trollheart 08-03-2022 07:10 PM

I love kids.
Couldn't finish a whole one, though...

The Batlord 08-03-2022 08:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart (Post 2213177)
I love kids.
Couldn't finish a whole one, though...

I usually have the kids finish me.

music_collector 08-03-2022 09:00 PM

Quote:

I'm sure it took its toll on you, but you're probably superior parents because of it.
I'd like to think we are, but only time will tell. That first year was an absolute killer. There's a reason it's called survival mode.

Kudos to the ladies. The physical pain I saw my wife go through, from trying to conceive all the way to recovering from delivery, there is no way I could have braved it all.

It dawned on me why a woman wouldn't want kids. That's a lot of work, even before the kid pops out!

Trollheart 08-04-2022 05:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord (Post 2213188)
I usually have the kids finish me.

Deliberately (munch!) misunderstanding is the (chew!) last refuge of the (bellcchh!) idiot. No, I'm full now. Maybe later. Stick it in the fridge for afters.

Guybrush 08-04-2022 08:49 AM

We thought about having kids for a few years before we made a real attempt. When we finally did it, it felt like the time for it because we had a house, a car, full time jobs, everything in order. The daily grind was becoming a little monotonous and I think we both wanted more in life. Not more hours of sleep or time to ourselves, obviously, but perhaps more unbridled enthusiasm, chaos, laughter, more meaning, a more profound presence of love in our lives. We were ready for the next step.

Now we have two kids. Where life was kinda monotonous and just rolling along, it now feels more like a roller coaster and it's always changing.

But no way am I getting another. I wanted a vasectomy for my 40th birthday.

music_collector 08-04-2022 06:29 PM

I know the feeling. By the time we started trying, we had the house, cars. My wife had hit one of her career goals (a salary milestone). I was firmly entrenched in my position at work. We took trips, went to so many concerts.

Thankfully, we were able to have our twins before it was "too late". The trying took four long, painful years.

Given the amount of spittle, puke, etc that comes up, a roller coaster is an excellent analogy to use.

I have yet to see the snip snip doctor. I probably should, just in case.


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