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Old 05-01-2014, 11:10 AM   #101 (permalink)
Zum Henker Defätist!!
 
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Granted. Nice Pinto.


I wish I had a turkey sandwich.
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There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 05-01-2014, 11:18 AM   #102 (permalink)
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Granted. But it's not free range.

I wish I had a hot stripper wife.
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And I actually am taking out a restraining order for you Batlord.
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Another one for the collection.
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Old 05-01-2014, 11:20 AM   #103 (permalink)
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Granted but she has a severe coke problem that drives you two apart. You lose the baby, the house, the car, everything and she ODs a year later. You never recover mentally.


I wish I made more money.
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Old 05-01-2014, 11:22 AM   #104 (permalink)
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Granted, but you spent it all on lap dances with Tristesse's wife.


I wish I could play guitar.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 05-01-2014, 11:26 AM   #105 (permalink)
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Granted, but you are restrained to only ever playing songs in the key of E minor.

I wish I rode sharks for a living.
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Another one for the collection.
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Old 05-01-2014, 12:21 PM   #106 (permalink)
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Granted, but a whale comes along and eats you both.


I wish that that I was rich.
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Old 05-01-2014, 12:48 PM   #107 (permalink)
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Granted, but in the same way that rich is used to describe dark chocolate or red wine.

I wish I could be a hot girl for a day.
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And I actually am taking out a restraining order for you Batlord.
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Another one for the collection.
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Old 05-01-2014, 01:04 PM   #108 (permalink)
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Granted, but you must have sex with Donald Trump so he'll pay for the procedure.

I wish the newer episodes of SpongeBob weren't so god awful.
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Old 05-01-2014, 01:11 PM   #109 (permalink)
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Granted, but you enjoy it so much that you can't stand to go back at the end of the day and wind up injuring yourself horribly in a botched at home sex change.

I wish the people I love weren't so far away from me.

Sane Psycho - they're much better, but it's because we live in an Idiocracy style world where the average IQ is 55
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Old 05-01-2014, 01:18 PM   #110 (permalink)
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Granted, but you must have sex with Donald Trump so he'll pay for the procedure.
I thought the catch was meant to be a bad thing?
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Another one for the collection.
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