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Old 06-02-2014, 11:52 AM   #211 (permalink)
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Granted. It went off without a hitch. Too bad you overslept and missed it.

I wish I was buds with Satan so I could do whatever I wanted but never have to worry about getting tortured in Hell. We'd just drink forties and throw our bottles at Hitler.
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The Batlord is amazing man. He loves some fine woman and he gets horny easily. What is better than that.
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Old 06-02-2014, 02:01 PM   #212 (permalink)
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Granted. It went off without a hitch. Too bad you overslept and missed it.

I wish I was buds with Satan so I could do whatever I wanted but never have to worry about getting tortured in Hell. We'd just drink forties and throw our bottles at Hitler.
Granted, but Hitler is a born-again Christian and tries his best to act like Jesus. After having thrown so many bottles on him that he's paralyzed forevermore, you realize that he's been a pretty nice guy for the last hundred years. Your conscience torments you, and you try to commit suicide several times, but you can't die, as you're already in hell.

I wish I was rich, happy, healthy, and not obnoxious, all at once.
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Old 06-02-2014, 02:25 PM   #213 (permalink)
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But you're on Musicbanter and no one appreciates it.

I wish this thread was deleted.
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Old 06-02-2014, 02:34 PM   #214 (permalink)
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But you're on Musicbanter and no one appreciates it.

I wish this thread was deleted.
Granted, the whole forum is deleted and it's your fault. An angry mob of batlords shows up at your house.

I wish I had the most neat haircut in the universe
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Old 06-03-2014, 08:45 AM   #215 (permalink)
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Granted. Now all women think you're gay.

I wish I had an English butler.
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Old 06-23-2014, 09:56 PM   #216 (permalink)
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Granted.

He's terrible at his job and makes fun of you in ways you don't realize.


I wish I could grow a better beard.
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Old 06-24-2014, 04:44 PM   #217 (permalink)
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Granted, but it grows so quickly when you wake up in the morning you have to untangle it from your pubes.

I wish Mr. Krabs would release the secret formula to the public.
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Old 06-24-2014, 04:55 PM   #218 (permalink)
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I wish Mr. Krabs would release the secret formula to the public.
Granted. It's semen. Animal semen.

I wish I could be a mod. (Not really, but for the purposes of this post let's just say I do.)
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Old 06-24-2014, 06:23 PM   #219 (permalink)
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You've been modded but only because MB is under Federal investigation and they need a patsy.

I wish my favorite foods were calorie free.
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Old 06-24-2014, 06:56 PM   #220 (permalink)
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Their taste comes from the calories.

I wish the grass was greener on the other side.
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