A Few Song Lyrics That Could Be Improved?

Shining On · 09-22-2026, 03:40 AM

I was thinking about popular classic era songs that contain lyrics that are sometimes infamous because they have lyrics that are unusual or are considered to be poorly written. I thought I'd highlight a few lyrics and try to improve them. Let me know what you think and include your own improvements of some song lyrics if you like!

Btw, I've underlined the lines in each verse that I'm changing as well as the newly changed lines.

Neil Diamond's I Am ... I Said

"I am ...I said
To no one there
And no one heard at all
Not even the chair "

My Version

I am ... I said
To no one there
And no one heard at all
Just leaving me scared

Africa by Toto

"It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you
There's nothin' that a hundred men or more could ever do
I bless the rains down in Africa
Gonna take some time to do the things we never had"

My Version

It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you
There's nothin' that a hundred men or more could ever do
I met Lorraine down in Africa
Gonna take some time to do the things we never had

Boys Of Autumn by David Roberts

"Boys will be boys
But whatever happens to the boys of autumn?
Boys will be boys
And you won't forget those boys of autumn"

My Version

Boys will be boys
But whatever happens to the boys' fathers?
Boys will be boys
And you won't forget those boys of autumn

We Built This City by Starship

"Marconi plays the mamba
Listen to the radio, don't you remember?
We built this city
We built this city on rock and roll"

My Version

My lonely days are numbered
Listening to the radio, don't you remember?
We built this city
We built this city on rock and roll

Thanks for reading this everybody.

DriveYourCarDownToTheSea · Today, 04:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shining On

I was thinking about popular classic era songs that contain lyrics that are sometimes infamous because they have lyrics that are unusual or are considered to be poorly written. I thought I'd highlight a few lyrics and try to improve them. Let me know what you think and include your own improvements of some song lyrics if you like!

Btw, I've underlined the lines in each verse that I'm changing as well as the newly changed lines.

Neil Diamond's I Am ... I Said

Ugh I wish you hadn't posted that one, that's gotta be the most annoying song I get stuck in my head.

09-22-2026, 03:40 AM	#1 (permalink)
Shining On Groupie Join Date: Sep 2026 Posts: 1	A Few Song Lyrics That Could Be Improved? I was thinking about popular classic era songs that contain lyrics that are sometimes infamous because they have lyrics that are unusual or are considered to be poorly written. I thought I'd highlight a few lyrics and try to improve them. Let me know what you think and include your own improvements of some song lyrics if you like! Btw, I've underlined the lines in each verse that I'm changing as well as the newly changed lines. Neil Diamond's I Am ... I Said "I am ...I said To no one there And no one heard at all Not even the chair " My Version I am ... I said To no one there And no one heard at all Just leaving me scared Africa by Toto "It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you There's nothin' that a hundred men or more could ever do I bless the rains down in Africa Gonna take some time to do the things we never had" My Version It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you There's nothin' that a hundred men or more could ever do I met Lorraine down in Africa Gonna take some time to do the things we never had Boys Of Autumn by David Roberts "Boys will be boys But whatever happens to the boys of autumn? Boys will be boys And you won't forget those boys of autumn" My Version Boys will be boys But whatever happens to the boys' fathers? Boys will be boys And you won't forget those boys of autumn We Built This City by Starship "Marconi plays the mamba Listen to the radio, don't you remember? We built this city We built this city on rock and roll" My Version My lonely days are numbered Listening to the radio, don't you remember? We built this city We built this city on rock and roll Thanks for reading this everybody. Last edited by Shining On; 09-23-2026 at 03:24 AM.