Who dat cute guy Mic posted. Cuz im single and ready to jingle. ;)

I have one of those. I just have a beard and a mustache to go with it.

Me too, I guess.

*flavour saver

When my beard was longer, everything else was longer with it, so I'd catch myself occasionally coaxing that soul patch in my mouth to suck the flavors. I then realized I'm a gross human pig of a man and promptly shaved.

You can dye your beard black too, you know.

My life experience tells me you fail to be able to grow facial hair.

It's okay. I understand your angst. I was 12 once too.

Bearded men have poop on their faces

I like beards aesthetically but omg the smells

I'm sure men think the same about your pits. Except they don't like them aesthetically.