Pixie steps Number 9...pixie steps.

^ so there's no shining light telling you "that's your gender" ?

How the hell would I know?

I guess it would be different for different people. It may be a gradual realisation for some or a shining light for others.

I guess i should wait for Amandria's answer. lol

I guess it's a life time of agony and a sense of fear about not being who you want to be and the possibility of not being accepted for who you really are.
The shining light may be at the end of a long tunnel for some, or a short tunnel for others.
Some may never want to discover the shining light at the end of the tunnel, for fear of it being the light of an oncoming train.
One things for sure. We live in a fucked up world if we feel we can't choose to be who we want to be.

i would assume it is just a feeling...like as sure as i like women i think someone who is *** would just naturally be attracted to the same sex. whether or not they fight that instinctual urge is where the trouble comes.

edit: why is that word considered bad?

Because of bad people Duga.

This is actually a pretty tricky question, at least from my perspective. I was going around a good number of years under the impression that I was as straight as an arrow (on the outside at least, practically though I was asexual). Social imposition of sexual identity can actually be that powerful. I actually consider myself lucky that the realization and recognition of my true sexuality came relatively early, at 17-18 (acceptance took many more years, unfortunately). And it came about through a lovely little film called Beautiful thing. I suppose I've always noticed men more than women but denial is a powerful thing. Not only that, I wasn't really familiar with the concept of homosexuality. The only times anyone in my immediate surrounding mentioned it was in an extremely derogatory manner. So it was a distant, unfamiliar and very negative notion. Then Beautiful thing came along and that was the first time I'd seen a positive depiction of a same-sex relationship. And it was absolutely electrifying. It was like a switch went on in my head and for the first time ever I knew this was who I am and that is what I wanted.

So yeah, it can be extremely confusing. I take it it's a little easier for heterosexuals? Your hormones kick in and there you have it?

in a nutshell...yeah.

i do have a question, though...do you think if people were a bit more tolerant (especially in the US) then it could potentially be as straightforward as that? or do you think there will always be some sort of internal struggle no matter what?