I'm not sure what you're getting at but I hope you enjoyed my adorable sweater.

I know, because it was unexpected.

Trololol?

This morning my bus was 20 minutes late because it was the driver's first day on the route by herself. Some jerk was really rude to her, being a little bitch as customers tend to do. The guy was holding on lightly to the stop signal cord and when my stop came up, I pulled it so sharply that it snapped out of his hand. I smiled when he jumped. I hope that guy falls on his ass into the biggest puddle he can find.

I think I might need psychiatric medicine because the rude thoughts I have make me laugh out loud. I can be found cackling away everywhere. Sad times.

Made me immediately think of John Doe from Se7en.

William Somerset: [Reading from one of John Doe's journals] On the subway today, a man came up to me to start a conversation. He made small talk, a lonely man talking about the weather and other things. I tried to be pleasant and accommodating, but my head hurt from his banality. I almost didn't notice it had happened, but I suddenly threw up all over him. He was not pleased, and I couldn't stop laughing.

That about sums it up. Either my head is so occupied it's gone vacant or I need some kind of creative inspiration.

I usually sit down to pee unless a urinal is available. It's just more relaxing.

I'm currently considering having sex with my burrito

I SO LONELY
I LOVE IT SO MUCH
BUT I STILL WANNA BE ABLE TO EAT IT
DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WD DOESN'T :(

I don't understand why you can't do both?