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-   -   Let The Domestic Goddess Help You! (https://www.musicbanter.com/lounge/65392-let-domestic-goddess-help-you.html)

jackhammer 10-11-2012 04:57 PM

Let The Domestic Goddess Help You!
 

As one of the more senior members on the forum and now a widowed father of two and holding down a job as a chef I feel it is only fair to dispense some of my wisdom to help in your day to day life. Some tips will be extremely beneficial and some tips will be a complete waste of time if you are a pot noodle eating student.

No pictures of me in an apron or frilly gloves luckily as that only occurs on a Sunday with the curtains closed ;)

Does your abode smell like cat's pee/last nights pizza/days old underwear or a dutch café in summer? Then fear not, the cure is here. Spray air fresheners, cheap liquid gel air fresheners or Neutradol block air fresheners not doing the job? Then get yourself some tumble dryer sheets. They are cheap, plentiful and don't smell like lager. Place them in discreet places such as underneath sofa's, wardrobes, behind the T.V or on top of high shelf's.

You don't have to spray supermarket flavour of the month spray air fresheners that cost far too much and you don't have to scrub and clean last weeks drink stains out of the carpet. You may have a problem if the other half/mother in law finds strategically placed white tissues around the place and wonders what the hell you have been up to but the pleasant aroma should more than make up for this.

Of course if you like the smell of stale alcohol and week old kebabs then you are a dirty slob and no amount of free beer will make me want to visit your home.

New tip coming soon so please tune in.

The Batlord 10-12-2012 08:55 AM

Dude, my cat peed on my bed the other day. How the hell do you get that **** outta the mattress?!

Burning Down 10-12-2012 09:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord (Post 1239666)
Dude, my cat peed on my bed the other day. How the hell do you get that **** outta the mattress?!

Get a litter box

FRED HALE SR. 10-12-2012 09:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord (Post 1239666)
Dude, my cat peed on my bed the other day. How the hell do you get that **** outta the mattress?!

Get rid of the mattress, buy a new one and get rid of the cat.

On a side note, Jack you can put the laundry sheets in the end of a toilet paper roll and tape it in place and blow out the end of it to create a spray like effect. I do that when i wanna smoke out cause my girlfriend hates the pot smell.

The Batlord 10-12-2012 09:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burning Down (Post 1239669)
Get a litter box

Unfortunately the cat is sick (renal failure and possibly cancer), so he's sorta going loopy, so he pees and ****s pretty much everywhere.

Quote:

Originally Posted by FRED HALE SR. (Post 1239675)
Get rid of the mattress, buy a new one

Oh, we got a millionaire up in here. ;)

Guybrush 10-12-2012 09:42 AM

Great thread!

But what is a tumble dryer sheet?

The Batlord 10-12-2012 09:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tore (Post 1239691)
Great thread!

But what is a tumble dryer sheet?

You know, a sheet of fabric softener.

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_evd06qPOjk...icSoftener.jpg

Guybrush 10-12-2012 10:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord (Post 1239693)
You know, a sheet of fabric softener.

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_evd06qPOjk...icSoftener.jpg

Don't think I've ever seen those in Norway. Here, fabric softener always comes in the shape of some liquid.

Won't the sheet wrinkle up and get lost somewhere inside a sock or a sweater only to show up in some annoying way later on?

The Batlord 10-12-2012 10:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tore (Post 1239711)
Don't think I've ever seen those in Norway. Here, fabric softener always comes in the shape of some liquid.

Won't the sheet wrinkle up and get lost somewhere inside a sock or a sweater only to show up in some annoying way later on?

Sometimes. Most of the times it's no biggie though. And on the plus side, you just put your clothes in the dryer, grab a sheet, throw it in, and presto, soft, nice smelling clothes.

ribbons 10-12-2012 10:17 AM

I have Bounce dryer sheets placed all over our apartment -- inside pillow casings, in drawers, in between couch seat cushions, on shelves. I also have a liking for liquid fabric softener and use it to excess in the wash. Our house smells like a strange combination of fabric softener and Shanthimalai Nag Champa incense (which I burn in an incense holder encased in large ceramic bowl, on top of the refrigerator!). :)

http://product.expotv.com/2/3/3/233786_100x100.jpg + http://i.ebayimg.com/t/Nag-Champa-In...M!eQ~~0_35.JPG


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