Would you Change for someone?

Black Francis · 05-06-2014, 04:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by butthead aka 216

had an argument with a girlfriend once about this. we both wanted each other to change. i started changin little thing bout me. my routine changed and i didnt mind at all to be honest. but the thing was that i asked her to change too. so one night after raucous exhausting sex in which i pleasured her immensely to the brink of nearly passing out, i knew we had to have a talk about these changes i was making and the ones she wasnt.

i said i see no changes, wake up in the morning and i ask myself
is this relationship worth havin or should i free myself
im tired of bein mad and even worse im sad
my stomach hurts so im lookin for some pepto bismol

That part cracked me up.

GuD · 05-06-2014, 05:42 PM

No.

I'm reckless, self destructive, and I drink too much. I also love too much. Take it or leave it.

~~James~~ · 05-06-2014, 05:52 PM

Butthead kind of got it. Only little things and only if it was reciprocated.

Engine · 05-06-2014, 10:31 PM

No, I would not change. Would attempt to understand/accommodate for the other and if I could I would. That's not a change.

Ero24 · 05-07-2014, 02:47 AM

I'd try to change as many of my flaws as possible. If it's someone you care about, you want them to feel good around you, right? Right.
But if the relationship pushes you to be something you're not, I suggest you drop it right there. It's not healthy. Better to be alone in an empty place than to be in a minefield.

djchameleon · 05-07-2014, 04:43 AM

If you end up comprising, those little things that you changed will always become an issue later on with fights. You will end up resenting the person and using it as leverage in those arguments. Not worth it.

~~butthead aka 216~~ · 05-07-2014, 07:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by djchameleon

If you end up comprising, those little things that you changed will always become an issue later on with fights. You will end up resenting the person and using it as leverage in those arguments. Not worth it.

For those lookin for relationship advice here on mb please take djs advice then forget about it abd do the complete opposite

Plankton · 05-07-2014, 08:18 AM

I think Andrew WK has an excellent grasp on this subject, although the premise is a bit off topic, the message is clear:

~~Sansa Stark~~ · 05-07-2014, 08:33 AM

no, I'm perfect

Burning Down · 05-07-2014, 08:55 AM

Small changes, for sure. I've been with my boyfriend for over 3 years now and yeah, we have each made some small changes in our habits or behaviours in order to get along better with each other. It's also important to know when to let things go and not to nitpick constantly or be demanding and nag all the time. That's annoying and doesn't accomplish anything.

I'm not going to expect him to give up on his dreams and life goals, just because they may not suit ME. I probably wouldn't even want to be in a long relationship with somebody who was heading in a completely different direction in life, though.

As for friendships, I make friends with people who have similar interests and hobbies, and I just avoid the people who don't fit my kind of lifestyle.

05-06-2014, 05:42 PM	#12 (permalink)
GuD Dude... What? Join Date: Oct 2013 Posts: 1,322	No. I'm reckless, self destructive, and I drink too much. I also love too much. Take it or leave it. __________________ I spit bullets in my feet Every time I speak So I write instead And still people want me dead ~msc

05-06-2014, 10:31 PM	#14 (permalink)
Engine air quote Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: pollen & mold Posts: 3,108	No, I would not change. Would attempt to understand/accommodate for the other and if I could I would. That's not a change. __________________ Like an arrow, I was only passing through.

05-07-2014, 08:18 AM	#18 (permalink)
Plankton Just Keep Swimming... Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: See signature... Posts: 7,766	I think Andrew WK has an excellent grasp on this subject, although the premise is a bit off topic, the message is clear: __________________ See location...

05-06-2014, 05:52 PM	#13 (permalink)
~~James~~ Account Disabled Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Scotland Posts: 4,483	Butthead kind of got it. Only little things and only if it was reciprocated.

05-07-2014, 02:47 AM	#15 (permalink)
Ero24 Groupie Join Date: May 2014 Location: Searching... Posts: 9	I'd try to change as many of my flaws as possible. If it's someone you care about, you want them to feel good around you, right? Right. But if the relationship pushes you to be something you're not, I suggest you drop it right there. It's not healthy. Better to be alone in an empty place than to be in a minefield.

05-07-2014, 08:33 AM	#19 (permalink)
~~Sansa Stark~~ Account Disabled Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: The Eyrie, Vale of Arryn, Westeros Posts: 3,234	no, I'm perfect

05-07-2014, 08:55 AM	#20 (permalink)
Burning Down The Music Guru. Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Beyond the Wall Posts: 4,858	Small changes, for sure. I've been with my boyfriend for over 3 years now and yeah, we have each made some small changes in our habits or behaviours in order to get along better with each other. It's also important to know when to let things go and not to nitpick constantly or be demanding and nag all the time. That's annoying and doesn't accomplish anything. I'm not going to expect him to give up on his dreams and life goals, just because they may not suit ME. I probably wouldn't even want to be in a long relationship with somebody who was heading in a completely different direction in life, though. As for friendships, I make friends with people who have similar interests and hobbies, and I just avoid the people who don't fit my kind of lifestyle.