Whats the dumbest thing u have ever heard
 

I heard a kid broke his leg trying to see if he could touch the light of a streetlight by climbing the pole. He made it to the top but forgot how to get down.

any and all knock knock jokes.

When i was 10ish i was watching MTV in my blink 182 shirt and i heard Mark did that and my thought was "wow hes so f*cking HARDCORE!"

Knock Knock !!

Who's there?

Atish........

*fills in for satch*

atish who?

bless you


..................

hahahahahahahahaha!!!! i get it

"you shut your mouth when your talking to me"

My wife meaning to tell me that all the lights were on in the house, saying " All the houses are in the light". Was one of those "had to be there" moments

Ive already posted this in the stupid thread, but what the hell, I really do love this story. (When listening in to a couple of the airheaded lasses from my school one day):

"Really? Its a band?! I always thought Nirvana was just a make of t-shirts"
"Yeah, I know, thats what I thought till my brother kept goin on about this grunge stuff"
"GRUNGE? What kind of stupid word is that?! I bet its like a cat food or something..."

*Sigh* Fortunately there were people in the room with shoes ready to throw at them :)

haha thats great

Haha I saw that Wedding Crashers movie today, pretty funny.



Umm....most stupid thing ever?

I don't know, but three situations come to mind.

Jim and I
Jimmy: Dude can I ask you a question?
Me: Yeah sure.
Jimmy: Would you have sex with Pamela Anderson or Carmen Electra?
Me: Well.....
Jimmy: But they both have Herpes.
Me: Dude????
Jimmy: And you can't pick neither.
Me: Well then....Carmen Electra, I guess.
Jimmy: Ewwwwww, dude you'd have sex with someone who you knew had Herpes?!??

Derrick and I
Derrick: Dude this breaker box is open and it has cords all over the place.
Me: Haha seriously?
Derrick: Yeah.
Me: Let's go **** it up.
Derrick: Okay.
Me: I'll just turn these four off and these three on.
(Fountain on huge subdivision pond shuts off)
Me: Wow I didn't know that would happen!
Derrick: Sweet!
Me: Let's **** it up more!
Random half-clothed man in nearby house: HEY YOU KIDS GET AWAY FROM THERE!
Us: **** YOU!
Us: *Run*

Derrick and I
Derrick: Dude I was just thinking about how many times I've almost died since I met you.
Me: Quite a few, I would imagine.
Derrick: Yeah, like eight, and it's only been two years or some $hit.
Me: Seriously?
Derrick: Yeah why?
Me: Because I only count seven for myself and I thought I was beating you.
Derrick: No way.
Me: Well did you count the time with the bus?
Derrick: Yeah.
Me: Man I was WAY closer, so that doesn't even count for you!!
Derrick: Bull**** dude.
Me: No, **** you dude, we're tied for almost dying.
Derrick: *runs into the bathroom and gets axe bodyspray and lighter*
Derrick: I bet you one hundred dollars I'll be beating you in two minutes.



Good times.
Good times.
I've probably heard way more stupid stuff than that though.
I mean those situations are pretty much everyday stuff now.

im guessing you can get bored very quickly

one time i set an umbrella on fire out of boredom.

haha thats great... i bet it smelt weird

My best guy friend has a hairy chest so we always make fun of him. Anyways so one day we were talking about it and he somehow mixed up his words and instead of saying hairy chest he said Cherry Hest by accident. it was so funny at the time ahha

you would win that bet.

:)

My history teacher last year had the corniest jokes EVER when we were taking tests he would randomly yell "Jack be nimble Jack be quick Jack jumpped over a candelstick... AND GOT BURNT!" andwhen someone would talk out of turn he would yell "YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE MORE THAN ANYTHING?!... Brown Puddles Under My Coffe Cup!!!" and he used to tell us not to look at him in that tone of voice:rolleyes: what a lame

"I believe a GAY marriage should be between a man and a woman" Arnold Schwazznegger:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Ahh, several things strike my mind;

First thing, a little recent, a friend of a friend of mine who likes most of the metal we do thinks Amon Amarth is abysmal compared to Cradle of Filth. Now, I don't mind people not liking the same music as me, but her reasoning was just...... flawed. "Amon Amarth sing about Vikings. Who would wanna do songs about Vikings? That's just ***. Like, with COF, they do deep songs about fictional stuff--" and the rest was just human dribble.

Next, also pertaining to music;

"It's all satanic and about the devil."

"It's all screaming and nonsense."

"Rap has more talent."

"Dimebag is a pussy compared to 50 cent. 50 cent got shot 9 times and lived. Dimebag got shot once and went down easily."

"Lil John is the closest thing to rock and roll any black man is today."

"No breakdowns? What am I gonna dance to?"

"If you can't understand the words, what's the point?"

"Hardcore is a step above emo..... or was it a step below? Either way, you're still falling down the stairs." This one I loved because it was so random. My friend was drunk when he was saying this, which kind of makes it funnier.

My other friend always says at least one stupid thing each time I see him;

Whenever we ask him about how his practicing is doing (he "supposedly" plays rhythm guitar for our band) he would say; "Dude, my days are so packed, I never have time to practice. I go to school, then afterwards I have to do my homework, then I play PS2 for a while, and then I have to go to bed. Between that and work, my schedule is just jam packed."

In a discussion about why Slipknot is nu-metal, his point was; "Whatever man, I still think of Slipknot as death metal."

Not only are the things he spews from his mouth stupid, but the **** he does; He broke all 3 PS2's my other friend had, and recently he had also dropped my other friend's laptop, causing it to lose ALL of our material; songs, fliers, and whatnot. Luckly, I had most of the stuff on my computer, but that **** is just dumb. And he doesn't apoligize. I know this is a "What dumb thing did you hear" thread, but I just think it's worth mentioning.

One time i set myself on fire out of boredom. :/

And i'm not talking a patch on my arm, i lathered my naked body in a bottle of expensive aftershave, and sparked myself up in my mates garden unfortunately being a tiled concrete garden i was hesitant to stop drop and roll when the fire consumed me and was pretty roasted, especially the under of my arms and my back.

...not one of my greatest ideas looking back.

from the linkin park thread

Have you read my sig?

:rofl:

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: omg i can't breath too funny!!!

LOL

Keep laughing.

Crowquill:

:>

Wow, Minor Threat sucks and I use to be such a druggie holy shit.

I'd also like to take this time to point out my signature for this thread.

Ha ha! I like it!

^^ use to be a "druggie"? aren't you 16? how is it possible to have already moved in and out of that phase?

Green day.

Wnba

Because its not hard to get a hold of pot, alcohol and pills? I was good friends with someone whos dad was a drug dealer, it was easy as hell to get it and I had a desire to do it.

How did you stop?

Because my girlfriend wouldn't have been with me if I was a druggie and she was upfront about that before anything happened and I love her more than anything especially getting high.

awwww.